Best comedy movie quotes of all time

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Movie Quote Quiz
White Christmas picture

Danny Kaye: My friend, when what's left of you gets around to what's left to be gotten, what's left to be gotten won't be worth getting whatever it is you've got left.

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Who Framed Roger Rabbit picture

Roger Rabbit: No! Not my Jessica! Not pattycake! It can't be! It just can't be! Jessica's my wife! It's absolutely impossible! Jessica's the love of my life. The apple of my eye. The cream in my coffee.
Eddie Valiant: Well you better start drinking it black, Acme's taking the cream now.

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The 40 Year Old Virgin picture

Andy: I dated this girl for a while... She was really a... Nasty freak. She just loved to... Get down with... Sex all the time. It was like... Anytime of day... She was like, "Yeah, let's go! I'm so nasty! And I'd be nailing her and she'd be like, "Oh, you're nailing me! Cool!"

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National Treasure: Book of Secrets picture

Ben Gates: Before the Civil War, the states were all separate. People used to say "the United States are..." It wasn't until the war ended that people started saying "the United States is..." Under Lincoln, we became one nation.

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Charade picture

Sylvie: It is infuriating that your unhappiness does not turn to fat!

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Two Mules for Sister Sara picture

Hogan: Sister if you wanna bless em you bless em dry.

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Sister Act picture

Reverend Mother: Girl groups? Boogie-Woogie on the piano? What were you thinking?
Dolores: I was thinking more like Vegas, you know? Get some butts in the seats.

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The Grand Budapest Hotel picture

M. Gustave: Well, what does it say? Where is it? What's it all about, damn it? Don't keep us in suspense, Serge, this has been a complete fucking nightmare! Just tell us what the fuck is going on!

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A Bad Moms Christmas picture

Carla: Since when did every woman in America need completely hairless vaginas on Christmas?

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The Holiday picture

Arthur Abbott: Iris, in the movies, we have leading ladies and we have the best friend. You, I can tell, are a leading lady, but for some reason, you're behaving like the best friend.

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29th Street picture

Frank Pesce Jr.: I wanna do something I never did before.
Frank Pesce Sr.: Oh really, then why don't you go upstairs and clean your fucking room.

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Freeway picture

Vanessa: Ho-ly shit! Well look who got beaten with the ugly stick. Bob, is that you? My God, I can't believe such an itty bitty gun could make such a big mess out of someone! You are so ugly Bob! Oh and hey I heard you have one of those poop bags where the shit comes out the side, you're just a big old shitbag aren't you Bob! I hope you think of me every time you shit in that thing, motherfucker!

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Coming to America picture

Rev. Brown: I got a special treat for ya' this evening, a young man that you all know as Joe the Policeman from the "What's Going Down" episode of "That's My Momma." I want you to put your hands together, and welcome him to the stage. Big round of applauds for Jackson Heights own, Mr. Randy Watson, YES! Randy Watson.

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Bulletproof Monk picture

Kar: So, I figured it out, why hot dogs come in packages of ten and hot dog buns come in packages of eight. See, the thing is, life doesn't always work out according to plan so be happy with what you've got, because you can always get a hot dog.

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Bill & Ted's Excellent Adventure picture

Abraham Lincoln: Fourscore and...[looks at his pocket watch]...seven minutes ago... We, your forefathers, were brought forth upon a most excellent adventure conceived by our new friends, Bill...and Ted. These two great gentlemen are dedicated to a proposition which was true in my time, just as it's true today. Be excellent to each other. And... Party on, dudes!

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Last Holiday picture

Georgia Byrd: I didn't come here to make an impression on anybody, I just came here to blow every last cent I had.

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Willow picture

Willow: What are you doing?
Madmartigan: I found some blackroot. She loves it.
Willow: Blackroot? I am the father of two children and you never, ever give a baby blackroot.
Madmartigan: Well my mother raised us on blackroot. It's good for you. Puts hair on your chest. Doesn't it, Sticks?
Willow: Her name is not Sticks. She's Elora Danan, the future empress of Tir Asleen and the last thing she's gonna want is a hairy chest.

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The Little Rascals picture

A.J. Ferguson: Now the race course is marked off with arrows, and it ends right back here, where it started from.

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