Best comedy movie quotes of 1994

Please vote as you browse around to help the best rise to the top.

Movie Quote Quiz
Dumb and Dumber picture

Lloyd: What do you mean you don't bet? Wussy! Wussy!
Harry: I never have and I never will.
Lloyd: Yeah, right. I bet you twenty bucks I can get you gambling before the end of the day.
Harry: No way.
Lloyd: I give you three to one odds.
Harry: No.
Lloyd: Five to one?
Harry: No.
Lloyd Ten to one?
Harry: You're on.
[Lloyd and Harry both shake hands and smile.]
Lloyd: I'm gonna get you.
Harry: Nuh-uh.
Lloyd: I don't know how, but I'm gonna get you.
Harry: Nuh-uh.

More Dumb and Dumber quotes
The Mask picture

The Mask: Our love is like a red, red rose... And I am a little thorny.

More The Mask quotes
More Ace Ventura: Pet Detective quotes
Forrest Gump picture

Forrest Gump: I may not be a smart man, but I know what love is.

More Forrest Gump quotes
Clerks picture

[Randal reads a newspaper while a customer studies two rental choices.]
Customer: They say so much, but they never tell you if it's any good.
[Randal continues reading, not even acknowledging her.]
Customer: Are either of these any good?
[Randal continues to read.]
Customer: Sir!
Randal: What?
Customer: Are either of these any good?
Randal: I don't watch movies.
Customer: Well, have you heard anything about either of them?
Randal: No.
Customer: You've never heard anybody say anything about either movie?
Randal: I find it's best to stay out of other people's affairs.
[The customer turns around, then turns back with the same two movies.]
Customer: Well, how about these two movies?
[Randal still never looks up.]
Randal: They suck!
Customer: I just held up the same two movies. You're not even paying attention.
Randal: No, I wasn't.
Customer: I don't think your manager would appreciate...
Randal: I don't appreciate your ruse, ma'am.
Customer: I beg your pardon?
Randal: Your ruse. Your cunning attempt to trick me.
Customer: I only pointed out that you weren't paying any attention to what I was saying.
Randal: I hope it feels good.
Customer: You hope what feels good?
Randal: I hope it feels so good to be right. There is nothing more exhilarating than pointing out the shortcomings of others, is there?
Customer: Well this is the last time I ever rent here...
Randal: You'll be missed.
Customer: Screw you!
[The customer storms out. Randal runs out into the street.]
Randal: Hey you're not allowed to rent here anymore!
Jay: Yeah!

More Clerks quotes
Naked Gun 33 1/3: The Final Insult picture

Frank Drebin: Hey, Rocco. Who's the old bag? She take one in the face?
Rocco: She's my mother.
Frank Drebin: Oh. Mrs. Dillon, your son is a ruthless, sadistic, cold-blooded animal. You must be very proud of him.
Mrs. Dillon: I am.

More Naked Gun 33 1/3: The Final Insult quotes
The Little Rascals picture

Darla: Waldo, I think we have to turn here.
Waldo: Girls have no sense of direction.
Darla: You know, you're starting to get on my nerves.

More The Little Rascals quotes
True Lies picture

Gib: Women. Can't live with 'em. Can't kill 'em.

More True Lies quotes
Airheads picture

Chazz: Who'd win in a wrestling match, Lemmy or God?
Chris Moore: Lemmy.
[Rex imitates a game show buzzer.]
Chris Moore: God?
Rex: Wrong, dickhead. Trick question. Lemmy is God.

More Airheads quotes
More Double Dragon quotes
The Santa Clause picture

Neil: What about Santa's reindeer? Have you ever seen a reindeer fly?
Charlie: Yes.
Neil: Well, I haven't.
Charlie: Have you ever seen a million dollars?
Neil: No.
Charlie: Just because you can't see something, doesn't mean it doesn't exist.

More The Santa Clause quotes
The Madness of King George picture

Warren: When will you get it into your head that one can produce a copious, regular and exquisitely turned evacuation every day of the week and still be a stranger to reason.

More The Madness of King George quotes
Baby's Day Out picture

FBI Agent Dale Grissom: You're surrounded! Throw down the Boo Boo and put your hands over your head.

More Baby's Day Out quotes
Four Weddings and a Funeral picture

Fiona: There's a sort of greatness to your lateness.
Charles: Thanks, it's not achieved without real suffering.

More Four Weddings and a Funeral quotes
D2: The Mighty Ducks picture

Jan: I see you met my new apprentice.
Charlie: Jan told me you did this job when you were my age.
Coach Bombay: That's right, and I hope he pays you more than he paid me.
Charlie: You got paid?
Jan: Eat, everybody, before the hasenpfeffer gets cold.

More D2: The Mighty Ducks quotes
House Party 3 picture

Uncle Vester: Whoa! My momma dead! Now I gotta cut ya! That's the rule, cut ya, cut ya.

More House Party 3 quotes
The Ref picture

Gus: I have a gun. It's loaded. Shut up.

More The Ref quotes
Reality Bites picture

Troy Dyer: I've wanted you like this for all these years.

More Reality Bites quotes
With Honors picture

Simon Wilder: Which door do I leave from?
Proffesor Pitkannan: At Harvard we don't end our sentences with prepositions.
Simon Wilder: Okay. Which door do I leave from, asshole?

More With Honors quotes
City Slickers 2 picture

Phil: In case we don't make it and I die first... Eat me.
Mitch: Eat you? I don't even like talking to you on the phone.

More City Slickers 2 quotes

Join the mailing list

Separate from membership, this is to get updates about mistakes in recent releases. Addresses are not passed on to any third party, and are used solely for direct communication from this site. You can unsubscribe at any time.

Check out the mistake & trivia books, on Kindle and in paperback.