Best comedy movie quotes of 1994

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Movie Quote Quiz
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The Mask picture

The Mask: Our love is like a red, red rose... And I am a little thorny.

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Dumb and Dumber picture

Lloyd: What do you mean you don't bet? Wussy! Wussy!
Harry: I never have and I never will.
Lloyd: Yeah, right. I bet you twenty bucks I can get you gambling before the end of the day.
Harry: No way.
Lloyd: I give you three to one odds.
Harry: No.
Lloyd: Five to one?
Harry: No.
Lloyd Ten to one?
Harry: You're on.
[Lloyd and Harry both shake hands and smile.]
Lloyd: I'm gonna get you.
Harry: Nuh-uh.
Lloyd: I don't know how, but I'm gonna get you.
Harry: Nuh-uh.

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Forrest Gump picture

Forrest Gump: Bit me directly in the but-tocks. They said it was a million dollar wound, but the Army must keep that money, 'cause I still ain't seen a nickel of that million dollars.

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Clerks picture

[Randal reads a newspaper while a customer studies two rental choices.]
Customer: They say so much, but they never tell you if it's any good.
[Randal continues reading, not even ackowledging her.]
Customer: Are either of these any good?
[Randal continues to read.]
Customer: Sir!
Randal: What?
Customer: Are either of these any good?
Randal: I don't watch movies.
Customer: Well, have you heard anything about either of them?
Randal: No.
Customer: You've never heard anybody say anything about either movie?
Randal: I find it's best to stay out of other people's affairs.
[The customer turns around, then turns back with the same two movies.]
Customer: Well, how about these two movies?
[Randal still never looks up.]
Randal: They suck!
Customer: I just held up the same two movies. You're not even paying attention.
Randal: No, I wasn't.
Customer: I don't think your manager would appreciate...
Randal: I don't appreciate your ruse, ma'am.
Customer: I beg your pardon?
Randal: Your ruse. Your cunning attempt to trick me.
Customer: I only pointed out that you weren't paying any attention to what I was saying.
Randal: I hope it feels good.
Customer: You hope what feels good?
Randal: I hope it feels so good to be right. There is nothing more exhilarating than pointing out the shortcomings of others, is there?
Customer: Well this is the last time I ever rent here...
Randal: You'll be missed.
Customer: Screw you!
[The customer storms out. Randal runs out into the street.]
Randal: Hey you're not allowed to rent here anymore!
Jay: Yeah!

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Naked Gun 33 1/3: The Final Insult picture

Frank Drebin: Hey, Rocco. Who's the old bag? She take one in the face?
Rocco: She's my mother.
Frank Drebin: Oh. Mrs. Dillon, your son is a ruthless, sadistic, cold-blooded animal. You must be very proud of him.
Mrs. Dillon: I am.

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The Little Rascals picture

A.J. Ferguson: Now the race course is marked off with arrows, and it ends right back here, where it started from.

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True Lies picture

Gib: Women. Can't live with 'em. Can't kill 'em.

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Airheads picture

Chazz: Who'd win in a wrestling match, Lemmy or God?
Chris Moore: Lemmy.
[Rex imitates a game show buzzer.]
Chris Moore: God?
Rex: Wrong, dickhead. Trick question. Lemmy is God.

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The Santa Clause picture

Charlie: It's Santa! You killed him.
Scott: Did not! And he's not Santa.
Charlie: Well, he was.

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The Madness of King George picture

Warren: When will you get it into your head that one can produce a copious, regular and exquisitely turned evacuation every day of the week and still be a stranger to reason.

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Baby's Day Out picture

FBI Agent Dale Grissom: You're surrounded! Throw down the Boo Boo and put your hands over your head.

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City Slickers 2 picture

Phil: In case we don't make it and I die first... Eat me.
Mitch: Eat you? I don't even like talking to you on the phone.

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The Ref picture

Gus: I have a gun. It's loaded. Shut up.

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Reality Bites picture

Troy Dyer: I've wanted you like this for all these years.

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The Pagemaster picture

Telephone Operator: Due to the storm, all lines have been temporarily disconnected. Please try your call again later.

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In The Army Now picture

Bones: I've seen lots of camel toes before, but never on a camel.

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Four Weddings and a Funeral picture

Charles: What turn off? Better not be the B359.
Scarlett: It's the B359.
Charles: Fuck it.

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A Low Down Dirty Shame picture

Shame: Ooh, silk drawers and a red tie. I gotta wear these together! Get off me ladies. I hear those ladies callin' my name, 'Shame, Shame!' Leave me alone, stop tuggin' at my silk drawers, don't love me like you do.
Peaches Jordan: Are you makin' fun of me?
Shame: Hell, yeah.

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