Richie Tozier: Go blow your dad, you mullet wearing asshole. (01:07:15)
Frank Castle: I leave this as a declaration of intent. So no one will be confused. One. Si vis pacum para bellum. Latin. The boot camp Sergeant made us recite it like a prayer. Si vis pacum para bellum. If you want peace, prepare for war. Number two. Frank Castle is dead. He died with his family. Number three. In certain extreme situations, the law is inadequate. In order to shame its inadequacy, it is necessary to act outside the law. To pursue natural justice. This isn't vengeance. Revenge is not a valid motive, it's an emotional response. No. Not vengeance. Punishment.
Jim: Well, it got so that every piss-ant prairie punk who thought he could shoot a gun would ride into town to try out the Waco Kid. I must have killed more men than Cecil B. DeMille. It got pretty gritty. I started to hear the word "draw" in my sleep. Then one day, I was just walking down the street when I heard a voice behind me say, "Reach for it, mister!" I spun around... And there I was, face-to-face with a six-year old kid. Well, I just threw my guns down and walked away. Little bastard shot me in the ass. So I limped to the nearest saloon, crawled inside a whiskey bottle, and I've been there ever since.
Grandpa Joe: Mr. Wonka, I don't know if you remember me, but I used to work here in the factory.
Willy Wonka: Were you one of those despicable spies who everyday tried to steal my life's work and sell it to those parasitic copycat candy making cads?
Grandpa Joe: No, sir.
Willy Wonka: Then wonderful, welcome back.
Carey Mahoney: What are you in for?
Larvell Jones: I'll show you. [holds a microphone to his mouth and imitates gun fire causing everyone to drop to the floor.]
Desk Officer: GOD DAMN IT, STOP THAT.
Peter Quill: I'm gonna ask you this one time, where is Gamora?
Tony Stark: Yeah, I'll do you one better, WHO is Gamora?
Drax: I'll do you one better, WHY is Gamora?
Steve Rogers: Before we get started, does anyone want to get out?
Peter Parker: I'm sick of Mr. Stark treating me like a kid.
Ned Leeds: But you are a kid.
Peter Parker: Yeah. A kid who can stop a bus with his bare hands.
Morpheus: You take the blue pill - the story ends, you wake up in your bed and believe whatever you want to believe. You take the red pill - you stay in Wonderland and I show you how deep the rabbit-hole goes.
Yoda: We are what they grow beyond.
Lilo: It's sandwich day. Every Thursday I give Pudge the Fish a peanut butter sandwich. But, today we were out of peanut butter. I asked my sister what to give him and she said a tuna sandwich. I can't give Pudge tuna! Do you know what tuna is? IT'S FISH! If I gave Pudge tuna, I'd be an abomination! I'm late because I had to go to the store and get peanut butter cause all we have is...is. Stinking tuna...Pudge controls the weather.
Doc Holliday: Oh. Johnny, I apologize; I forgot you were there. You may go now.
Pope Francis: When no-one is to blame, everyone is to blame.
Alfred: Why bats, Master Wayne?
Bruce Wayne: Bats frighten me. It's time my enemies shared my dread.
Creasy: Okay, my friend. It's off to the next life for you. I guarantee you, you won't be lonely.
Inigo Montoya: That Vizzini, he can fuss.
Fezzik: ...fuss...fuss... I think he likes to scream at us.
Inigo Montoya: Probably he means no harm.
Fezzik: He's really very short on charm.
Inigo Montoya: Oh, you've a great gift for rhyme.
Fezzik: Yes, yes, some of the time.
Vizzini: Enough of that.
Inigo Montoya: Fezzik, are there rocks ahead?
Fezzik: If there are, we'll all be dead.
Vizzini: No more rhymes now, I mean it.
Fezzik: Anybody want a peanut?
Vizzini: AARRGGHH!
Robin Hood: For my first order of business, I wish to appoint a new Sheriff of Rottingham. My friend, Achoo.
Achoo: All right.
Crowd: A black sheriff?
Blinkin: He's black?
Achoo: And why not? It worked in Blazing Saddles.
Gingy: Ok, ok...I'll tell you. Do you know the Muffin Man?
Farquad: The Muffin Man?
Gingy: The Muffin Man.
Farquad: Yes, I know the Muffin Man. Who lives on Drury Lane?
Gingy: Well...she's married to...the Muffin Man.
Farquad: The Muffin Man?
Gingy: The Muffin Man!
Farquad: She's married to the Muffin Man?