Best comedy movie quotes of 1999

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Movie Quote Quiz
10 Things I Hate About You picture

Patrick: Don't ever let any one make you feel like you don't deserve what you want.

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Office Space picture

Peter Gibbons: What would you do if you had a million dollars?
Lawrence: I'll tell you what I'd do, man, two chicks at the same time, man.
Peter Gibbons: That's it? If you had a million dollars, you'd do two chicks at the same time?
Lawrence: Damn straight. I always wanted to do that, man. And I think if I had a million dollars I could hook that up, cause chicks dig a dude with money.
Peter Gibbons: Well, not all chicks.
Lawrence: Well the kind of chicks that'd double up on a dude like me do.
Peter Gibbons: Good point.
Lawrence: Well what about you now? what would you do?
Peter Gibbons: Besides two chicks at the same time?
Lawrence: Well yeah.
Peter Gibbons: Nothing.
Lawrence: Nothing, huh?
Peter Gibbons: I'd relax, I would sit on my ass all day, I would do nothing.
Lawrence: Well you don't need a million dollars to do nothing, man. Just take a look at my cousin, he's broke, don't do shit.

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Dogma picture

Liz: He said that faith is like a glass of water. When you're young, the glass is small, and it's easy to fill up. But the older you get, the bigger the glass gets, and the same amount of liquid doesn't fill it anymore. Periodically, the glass has to be refilled.
Bethany: You're suggesting I need to get filled?
Liz: In more ways than one. You need to get laid, Bethany Sloane. You need a man, if only for ten minutes.
Bethany: It's been my experience that the average male is never a man. Not even for ten minutes in his entire lifespan.
Liz: That'a a bit militant. You thinking of joining the other side?
Bethany: Couldn't do it. Women are insane.
Liz: Then YOU need to go back to church and ask God for a third option.
Bethany: I think that God is dead.
Liz: The sign of a true Catholic.

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American Pie picture

Finch: God bless the Internet.

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Galaxy Quest picture

Guy Fleegman: I'm not even supposed to be here! I'm just "Crewman Number Six"! I'm expendable! I'm the guy in the episode who dies to prove how serious the situation is! I've gotta get outta here!

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Austin Powers: The Spy Who Shagged Me picture

Ivana Humpalot: Do you know how we keep warm in Russia?
Austin Powers: Oh ho ho! I can guess, baby.
Ivana Humpalot: We play chess.
Austin Powers: I guessed wrong.

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Jakob the Liar picture

Jakob Heym: Hitler goes to a fortune-teller and asks, "When will I die?" And the fortune-teller replies, "On a Jewish holiday." Hitler then asks, "How do you know that?" And she replies, "Any day you die will be a Jewish holiday."

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South Park: Bigger, Longer & Uncut picture

Mr. Garrison: OK, children. Let's start the day with a few new math problems. What is 5 X 2? Come on children, don't be shy. Just give it your best shot.
[Clyde puts his hand up.]
Mr. Garrison: Clyde?
Clyde: 12?
Mr. Garrison: OK. Now let's try to get an answer from someone who's not a complete retard.

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Mystery, Alaska picture

Donnie Shulzhoffer: Hey, you know where a guy can get a rub and a tug around here?

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The Thomas Crown Affair picture

Catherine Banning: Damn, I hate being a foregone conclusion.

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Lake Placid picture

Hector Cyr: She tell you that we had sex together? So vigorous!
Kelly Scott: I never had sex with you!
Hector Cyr: I'm horrible in bed. They never remember.

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Wild Wild West picture

Capt. James West: Never drum on a white lady's boobies at a big redneck dance. Got it.

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The Mummy picture

Evelyn: You know, nasty little fellows such as yourself always get their comeuppance.
Beni: They do?

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Analyze This picture

Ben Sobel: My name is Ben Sobel...leone. Ben Sobelleone. I'm also known as Benny the Groin, Sammy the Schnauz, Elmer the Fudd, Tubby the Tuba, and once... Once as Miss Phyllis Levine.

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Toy Story 2 picture

Buzz Lightyear: I'll never give in. You killed my father!
Emperor Zurg: No, Buzz. I *am* your father!
Buzz Lightyear: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

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Notting Hill picture

Anna Scott: I'm just a girl, standing in front of a boy, asking him to love her.

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The Bachelor picture

Jimmie: Just give me the damn symbolic vaginas.
Marco: You are sick.

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Being John Malkovich picture

Lotte Schwartz: We love her, Craig.
Craig Schwartz: We?
Lotte Schwartz: John and me.
Craig Schwartz: Don't forget about me.
Lotte Schwartz: Well you have a Maxine action figure to play with.

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The Best Man picture

Shelby: Ah, Harper Stewart. Richard Wrong. Langston Snooze.
Harper Stewart: Hi, Shelby.
Shelby: I heard about your book, and I don't think it's cute Harper. You know, the next time you want to characterize me in one of your little projects, do me a favor.
Harper Stewart: What would that be, Shelby?
Shelby: Don't.

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Big Daddy picture

Sonny: What's in the bag Corrine? Chicken wings? Booby tassles?

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