Cheerleaders: Sixty-nine, is divine. Sixty-nine, is divine.
Hawkeye Pierce: It's a good thing you have a nice body, nurse, otherwise they'd get rid of you quick.
Capt. 'Ugly John' Black: Anybody know if this is an officer or an enlisted man?
Hawkeye Pierce: He's an enlisted man.
Capt. 'Ugly John' Black: Make the stitches bigger.
Trapper John: Well, you know, Man o' War, after they retired him from racing, they put him out to stud. And he had an average of about a hundred and twenty, a hundred and thirty foals a year, and he lived to be thirty-six. And then when he died, they did an autopsy, and they found out that he was a raving queen.