Best comedy movie quotes of 2013

Anchorman 2: The Legend Continues picture

Freddie Shapp: You're on the 2 AM to 5 AM slot.
Ron Burgundy: What? That's the graveyard shift!
Brick Tamland: I ain't afraid of no ghost!

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Frozen picture

Olaf: I can't feel my legs! I can't feel my legs!
Kristoff: Those are my legs.

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Lily Harrison
The Wolf of Wall Street picture

Jordan Belfort: I fucked her brains out... For eleven seconds.

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The Secret Life of Walter Mitty picture

Walter Mitty: To see the world, things dangerous to come to, to see behind walls, draw closer, to find each other, and to feel. That is the purpose of life.

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The World's End picture

Gary King: Get in your rocket, and fuck off back to Legoland, you cunt!

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This Is the End picture

Jonah Hill: Dear God, it's me, Jonah Hill... From Moneyball.

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The Heat picture

Mullins: That cat took one look at your shitty shitty life, and said nooooo fucking thanks.

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Warm Bodies picture

Nora: You miss him...like a boyfriend. You miss your zombie boyfriend?

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9

Red 2 (2013)

Red 2 picture

Marvin: If there's one thing I know, it's women and covert operations.
Frank: Marvin, that's two things.
Han Cho Bai: No, grasshopper. It is not.

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Kick-Ass 2 picture

Mindy Macready: You don't have to be a bad-ass to be a superhero. You just have to be brave.

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Bad Grandpa picture

Billy: What's your stripper's stage name?
Clerk: Do I look like a stripper?
Billy: I'll just call you Cinnamon.

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Free Birds picture

Indian Chief: Those are some angry birds.

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We're the Millers picture

Casey Mathis: These assholes are trying to steal my iPhone!
David Clark: Wait, you have an iPhone? Aren't you homeless?
Casey Mathis: So? Fuck you, dude!

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Despicable Me 2 picture

Gru: Goodnight Margo. Whoa, wait, hold your horses, who are you texting?
Margo: No one, just my friend Avery.
Gru: Oh, Avery, wait. Avery, is that a boy's name or a girl's name?
Margo: Does it matter?
Gru: No, no, it doesn't matter, Unless it's a boy!

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Mom: I'm sorry, sweetie. It's my fault. I should have never sent a boy to do a man's job.
Jack: I didn't think I could feel worse. Surprise.

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Quantom X
Grown Ups 2 picture

Greg: Is your dad Marcus Higgins?
Andre: Yeah, I've known him since I was a baby, he's the funniest.
Greg: The best, great, great man.
Braden: I wanna smash his face.
Andre: Yeah, me too.
Greg: Yeah, I hate that guy.
Andre: Screw him.

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Saving Mr. Banks picture

P.L. Travers: I will not have her called Cynthia, absolutely not. It feels unlucky. It should be something warm, a bit sexy. How about Mavis?

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About Time picture

Mary: I'm going to go into the bedroom and put on my new pyjamas, and in a minute you can come in and take them off.

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Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs 2 picture

Earl Devereaux: I'm not a barista! I'm a police-sta!

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R.I.P.D. picture

Roy: Hit him in the jiggly.

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August: Osage County picture

Barbara Weston: Marriage is hard.
Karen Weston: That's one thing about mom and dad. You gotta tip your hat to anybody who can stay married that long.
Ivy Weston: Karen, he killed himself.

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Alan Partridge: Alpha Papa picture

Alan Partridge: You're like a big Geordie Anne Frank.

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Movie 43 picture

Veronica: I can't believe you named your dog Veronica.
Neil: I can't believe you sucked off that hobo for magic beans!
Veronica: He was a wizard, Neil!

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The Croods picture

Guy: I call them shoes.
Eep: I LOVE them! Where are my feet?
Guy: Don't worry! They're still there.

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Identity Thief picture

Diana: Ugh, my neck!
Sandy: Neck hurts, huh? Why don't we swap information, Sandy Bigelow Patterson. Bigelow's such a rare name.
Diana: It's a family name. Jeremiah Bigelow was a pretty well known bear hunter.
Sandy: He sounds brave. Here's my driver's license with my name, Sandy Bigelow Patterson. Gotcha!

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The Smurfs 2 picture

Papa: It doesn't matter where you came from. What matters is who you choose to be.

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Pain & Gain picture

Victor Kershaw: I'm a self-made man. I've made a lot of money!
Daniel Lugo: Why don't you spend some of it on salads?
Victor Kershaw: You know who invented salads? Poor people!

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Monsters University picture

Young Mike: I found a nickel! I wish I had pockets.

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29

Filth (2013)

Filth picture

Bladesey: What made you join the Force?
Bruce Robertson: Police oppression, brother.
Bladesey: You wanted to stamp it out from the inside?
Bruce Robertson: No, I wanted to be a part of it.

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Scary Movie 5 picture

Lindsay Lohan: I'm gonna blow you across the room.
Charlie Sheen: Sounds awesome.

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