Best comedy movie quotes of all time

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Movie Quote Quiz
McLintock! picture

Running Buffalo: Swell party, where's the whisky?

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Mamma Mia! picture

Donna: I grew up.
Tanya: Well, grow back down then!

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The Wedding Date picture

Nick Mercer: I'd rather fight with you than make love with anyone else.

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As Good As It Gets picture

Secretary: How do you write women so well?
Melvin Udall: I think of a man, and I take away reason and accountability.

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The Big Lebowski picture

Goon: What the fuck is this?
[Picks up a bowling ball hesitatingly.]
The Dude: Obviously you're not a golfer.

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How to Train Your Dragon picture

Stoick: When we crack this mountain, all hell is going to break loose.
Gobber: In my undies. Good thing I brought extras.

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The Ballad of Buster Scruggs picture

Buster Scruggs: Misanthrope? I don't hate my fellow man, even when he's tiresome and surly and tries to cheat at poker. I figure that's just a human material, and him that finds in it cause for anger and dismay is just a fool for expecting better.

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The Parent Trap picture

Nick Parker: You two help Meredith.
Meredith Blake: Sure you'll help me. Right over a cliff, you'll help me.
Hallie Parker: Not a bad idea.
Annie James: Yeah, see any cliffs?

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Dark Shadows picture

Barnabas Collins: What is your age?
Carolyn Stoddard: Fifteen.
Barnabas Collins: Fifteen, and no husband? You must put those child-bearing hips to good use, lest your womb shrivel up and die.

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Scott Pilgrim vs. the World picture

Scott Pilgrim: When I'm around you, I kind of feel like I'm on drugs. Not that I do drugs. Unless you do drugs, in which case I do them all the time. All of them.

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Forrest Gump picture

Forrest Gump: Bit me directly in the but-tocks. They said it was a million dollar wound, but the Army must keep that money, 'cause I still ain't seen a nickel of that million dollars.

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Hunt for the Wilderpeople picture

Hec: Pretty majestical, aye?
Ricky Baker: I don't think that's a word.
Hec: Majestical? Sure it is.
Ricky Baker: Nah, it's not real.
Hec: What would you know?
Ricky Baker: It's majestic.
Hec: That doesn't sound very special, majestical's way better.

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Step Brothers picture

Dale Doback: Oprah, Barbra Walters, your wife. You gotta fuck one, kill one, and marry one, go!

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Mean Girls picture

Regina: I know she's kind of socially retarded and weird, but she's my friend... So, just promise me you won't make fun of her! (00:01:00)

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Pirates of the Caribbean: At World's End picture

Jack Sparrow: I have no sympathy for any of you feculent maggots and no more patience to pretend otherwise. Gentlemen, I wash my hand of this weirdness.

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Super Troopers picture

[Having pulled over a speeding driver.]
Mac: All right, how about Cat Game?
Foster: Cat Game? What's the record?
Mac: Thorny did six, but I think you can do ten.
Foster: Ten? Starting right meow?
[They go up to the car.]
Driver: Sorry about the...
Foster: All right meow. Hand over your license and registration.
[The man gives him his license.]
Foster: Your registration? Hurry up meow.
Driver: [laughing.] Sorry.
Foster: Is there something funny here boy?
Driver: Oh, no.
Foster: Then why you laughing, Mister... Larry Johnson?
[Foster stares at him.]
Foster: All right meow, where were we?
Driver: Excuse me, are you saying meow?
Foster: Am I saying meow?
Driver: I thought...
Foster: Don't think boy. Meow, do you know how fast you were going?
[The man laughs.]
Foster: Meow. What is so damn funny?
Driver: I could have sworn you said meow.
Foster: Do I look like a cat to you, boy? Am I jumpin' around all nimbly-bimbly from tree to tree? Am I drinking milk from a saucer? DO YOU SEE ME EATING MICE?
[The man is uncontrollably laughing.]
Foster: You stop laughing right meow!
Driver: [Stops and swallows hard.] Yes sir.
Foster: Meow, I'm gonna have to give you a ticket on this one. No buts meow. It's the law.
[Rips off the ticket and hands it to the man.]
Foster: Not so funny meow, is it?
[Foster gets up to leave, but Mac shakes his hands at him, indicating only nine meows.]
Foster: Meow!

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A Rainy Day in New York picture

Terry: Time flies.
Gatsby Welles: Yes, unfortunately, it flies coach.
Terry: What's that supposed to mean?
Gatsby Welles: It's not always a comfortable trip.

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The Princess Diaries picture

Joe: No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.

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Airplane picture

Gunderson: He's all over the place! Nine hundred feet up to 1300 feet. What an asshole!

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I Think I Love My Wife picture

Mr. Landis: You can lose lots of money chasing women, but you will never lose women chasing money.

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