Best comedy movie quotes of 2003

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Movie Quote Quiz
Pirates of the Caribbean: The Curse of the Black Pearl picture

Jack Sparrow: Who makes all these?
Will Turner: I do. And I practice with them... Three hours a day.
Jack Sparrow: You need to get yourself a girl, mate. Or perhaps the reason you practice three hours a day is that you've already found one and are otherwise incapable of wooing said strumpet. You're not a eunuch, are you?

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Bad Boys II picture

Marcus Burnett: You a virgin?
Reggie: Yes, sir.
Marcus Burnett: Good. Keep it that way. Ain't gonna be no fucking tonight.
Mike Lowrey: You ever made love to a man?
Reggie: No.
Mike Lowrey: You want to?

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Elf picture

Buddy: You sit on a throne of lies!

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Love Actually picture

Natalie: Hello, David. I mean "sir." Shit, I can't believe I've just said that. Oh, and now I've gone and said "shit" - twice. I'm so sorry, sir.
Prime Minister: It's fine, it's fine. You could've said "fuck", and then we'd have been in real trouble.
Natalie: Thank you, sir. I did have an awful premonition that I was going to fuck up on the first day. Oh, piss it!

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The Cat in the Hat picture

Cat in the Hat: Don't worry, I have three plans. Plan A: Mess up a perfectly clean house. Done that! Plan B: Cut your losses and ditch the kids. That could work.
Sally: What about that one?
Cat in the Hat: Plan C: Trick Mom's boyfriend into handing over dog and lock. I don't know. I still like Plan B.

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Scary Movie 3 picture

George: Sue's teacher, Brenda. She's... She's dead.
Tom: Oh. I better tell her.
George: No, no, no. I can do it. Sue?
Sue: Yes?
George: You know your teacher, Miss Brenda?
Sue: Yeah.
George: She's dead!
Sue: Aah!
George: Gone forever! Died a horrible, painful death! Gone, gone, gone, just like your dog!
Sue: My dog's dead?
George: I just ran him over with the car when I drove in! Everyone you love around you is dying!

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Finding Nemo picture

Gurgle: Oh, the human mouth is a disgusting place.

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Johnny English picture

Bough: Shall we call for back-up sir?
Johnny English: What? And watch some fat-bottomed bobby make our arrest for us? I don't think so.

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School of Rock picture

Dewey: Billy what makes you angrier than anything in the world?
Billy: You.
Dewey: Billy, we've already told me off, now let's move on.
Billy: You're tacky and I hate you.
Dewey: Ok, you see me after class!

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National Security picture

Lawyer: So Mr. Montgomery, are you claiming there was no bumblebee present at the time of the incident?
Earl Montgomery: No, I'm not. There was a bumblebee present, man.
Lawyer: Oh, good.
Earl Montgomery: And there were birds chirpin'. There were dogs barkin'. Hell, for all I know, there was a chipmunk in the bushes, humping a turtle! You know you gotta be careful with them chipmunks. They'll hump anything!

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American Wedding picture

Stifler: Well polish my nuts and serve me a milkshake.

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Cheaper by the Dozen picture

Tom Baker: You soaked his underwear in meat? That is so wrong. Funny, but wrong.

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Head of State picture

Mays: Yo, Lewis. Your mother's ass is so big, when she sits down she's three feet taller. Yo, Lewis. Your mother got a really big ass.
Advisor: Sir, I think it's time we prepare for a debate.
Senator Lewis: Give me one good reason to debate that jerk.
Advisor: He talked about your mother, sir.
Senator Lewis: So what?
[Senator Lewis' mother walks up to him and slaps him in the face.]
Mother: Are you just going to let him talk about me like that?

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Bruce Almighty picture

Bruce: God, why do you hate me?

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Just Married picture

Tom: I just hope that... I can be... all that I can... be... in this... family.

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How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days picture

Ben: Hanging with her for 10 days is gonna be no problem.
Tony: Right. That's only nine days longer than you've ever spent with any other chick, huh?

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Shanghai Knights picture

Chon Wang: For father.
Chon Lin: For father.
Roy: For Old Man Wang.

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Old School picture

Waiter: Love, it's a motherfucker, huh?

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Bringing Down the House picture

Peter Sanderson: Ashley! Who are you doing here?

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What A Girl Wants picture

Henry Dashwood: I think I owe you a rather large apology.
Libby Reynolds: Do you think I've waited 17 years for an apology?

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