Best comedy movie quotes of 1982

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Movie Quote Quiz
Grease 2 picture

Principal Mcgee: If you play an instrument, remember, it is better to play with a group then with yourself.

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Airplane II: The Sequel picture

Steve McCroskey: Jacobs, I want to know absolutely everything that's happened up till now.
Jacobs: Well, let's see. First the earth cooled. And then the dinosaurs came, but they got too big and fat, so they all died and they turned into oil. And then the Arabs came and they bought Mercedes Benzes. And Prince Charles started wearing all of Lady Di's clothes. I couldn't believe it.

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Night Shift picture

Chuck: Bill, let me try to explain this to you. As we sit here and idly chat, there are women, female human beings, rolling around in strange beds with strange men and we are making money from that.
Bill: Is this a great country or what?!

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Porky's picture

Wendy: Has anybody seen Mike Hunt?
Meat: Practically everybody in town from what I hear.

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48 Hours picture

Reggie: Jack... Tell me a story.
Jack: Fuck you.
Reggie: Oh, that's one of my favorites.

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Creepshow picture

Wilma Northrup: I mean, some of these so-called academics make the shark in "Jaws" look like fuckin' Flipper.

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Fast Times at Ridgemont High picture

Desmond: That kid's been stoned since the third grade.

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Tootsie picture

John Van Horne: Does Jeff know?

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Young Doctors in Love picture

Dr. Oliver Ludwig: There are over twenty bodily fluids present in the human body and I am proud to say I have tasted all of them.

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The King of Comedy picture

Rupert Pupkin: I'm gonna work 50 times harder, and I'm gonna be 50 times more famous than you.
Jerry Langford: Then you're gonna have idiots like you plaguing your life.

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The Best Little Whorehouse in Texas picture

Miss Mona: You know what burns my ass?
Ed Earl: What?
Miss Mona: A flame about three feet high.

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The Last American Virgin picture

Carmela: Come to me my big burrito.
David: Me?
Carmela: You are the only man I see. Come to Carmela.

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Victor/Victoria picture

Victoria: Let me ask you a question.
Toddy: You want to know if I'm a homosexual.
Victoria: No. I want to know if you're a hypochondriac.

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A Midsummer Night's Sex Comedy picture

Ariel: How's your marriage?
Andrew: My marriage is fine.
Ariel: Ya?
Andrew: It's not working but it's fine.

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The World According to Garp picture

Jenny Fields: Are you gonna go to sleep or you gonna stay up and think your weird thoughts?
Young Garp: I'll stay up and think weird thoughts for a while.

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Deathtrap picture

Sidney Bruhl: Every time I come in this bloody house, you scream.

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Summer Lovers picture

Lina: Jealousy doesn't show how much you love someone, it shows how insecure you are.

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The Toy picture

Fräulein: I'm gonna tell your father.
Jack Brown: Does everybody around here say that?
Eric Bates: Yeah.
Jack Brown: Well I'm not gonna say it anymore.

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Diner picture

Boogie: You want to bet that she goes for my pecker - first thing?
Fenwick: The only hand on your pecker is going to be your own.
Boogie: You want to bet me? You want to bet me twenty?
Fenwick: Yeah.
Eddie: I'm in.
Modell: Me too.
Shrevie: Yeah, I'm in too. But, we need validation.
Boogie: All right. I'll arrange it.
Shrevie: How? You gonna get - finger prints? I'm tellin' ya, I'm not gonna do the dustin'.

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The Slumber Party Massacre picture

Mrs. Devereaux: You lock all the doors and windows.
Trish: Mom, I'm eighteen years old, remember?
Mrs. Devereaux: You will always be my baby.

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