Best comedy movie quotes of 1984

Nigel: The numbers all go to eleven. Look, right across the board, eleven, eleven, eleven and...
Martin: Oh, I see. And most amps go up to ten?
Nigel: Exactly.
Martin: Does that mean it's louder? Is it any louder?
Nigel: Well, it's one louder, isn't it? It's not ten. You see, most blokes, you know, will be playing at ten. You're on ten here, all the way up, all the way up, all the way up, you're on ten on your guitar. Where can you go from there? Where?
Martin: I don't know.
Nigel: Nowhere. Exactly. What we do is, if we need that extra push over the cliff, you know what we do?
Martin: Put it up to eleven.
Nigel: Elevn. Exactly. One louder.
Martin: Why don't you just make ten louder and make ten be the top number and make that a little louder?
[Pause.]
Nigel: These go to eleven.

Carey Mahoney: What are you in for?
Larvell Jones: I'll show you. [holds a microphone to his mouth and imitates gun fire causing everyone to drop to the floor.]
Desk Officer: GOD DAMN IT, STOP THAT.

Ray Stantz: Where do these stairs go?
Peter Venkman: They go up.

Doctor Flamond: You see, a year ago, I was close to perfecting the first magnetic desalinization process so revolutionary, it was capable of removing the salt from over 500 million gallons of seawater a day. Do you realize what that could mean to the starving nations of the earth?
Nick Rivers: Wow. They'd have enough salt to last forever.

Mrs. Thompson: I had a wiener right in my hand.

Detective Rosewood: Wow. You know, it says here that by the time the average American is fifty, he's got five pounds of undigested red meat in his bowels.
Sergeant Taggart: Why are you telling me this? What makes you think I have any interest in that at all?
Detective Rosewood: Well, you eat a lot of red meat.

Bud: I'd rather die on my feet than live on my knees.

Zolo: Crocodiles shed tears when they eat their prey. You have heard of these tears I am sure. But have you seen them?

Samantha: This is the single worst day of my entire life.
Mike Baker: What the hell are you bitchin' about? I have to sleep under some Chinaman named after duck's dork.
Samantha: Well, where am I sleeping?
Mike Baker: Sofa City, Sweetheart.

Freddie: People fall in love every day, huh? Is that what you said?
Allen: Yeah.
Freddie: Yeah? Well, that's a crock. It doesn't work that way. Look, do you realise how happy you were with her? That is, of course, when you weren't driving yourself crazy. Every day? Come on. Some people will never be that happy. I'LL never be that happy. What am I talking to you for? You don't know anything.

Danny Vermin: I enjoy collecting protection money, putting whores to work, loan-sharking. I enjoy planting bombs in people's cars. These are a few of my favorite things.
Johnny Dangerously: You know, Danny, I think you get too much sugar in your diet.

Bruce: I heard that the monster is soooo big.
Chauncey: Well I bet he's got his eye on ME.
Bruce: For your information, everyone knows monsters prefer blondes.

Selena: I'm considering nothing less than world domination.

Gonzo: Mr. Mayor! Mr. Mayor, I'm looking for a frog who can sing and dance.
The Honorable Edward I. Koch: If he can balance the budget, I'll hire him.

Larry Hubbard: I mean, this is really getting drastic. I don't have anything in my place, I just left with a suitcase. I lost my comb. This morning, I had to brush my hair with my toothbrush. I mean, I cleaned it out really good so I feel more comfortable, but it takes about twenty minutes. Does it look okay?
Warren Evans: No, it looks good, I was just thinking about how good it looks.
Larry Hubbard: I think it looks good... I should get a comb.

Jon Gomez: Lest we let this place become a zoo, not to mention a haven for gawkers.

Sunny Davis: I'm not yelling, I'm just speaking distinctly.

Teddy Pierce: While Didi was waiting for me in San Francisco, Charlotte was waiting in Los Angeles. Two women waiting for me in the middle of the night. Crazy as it seems, I had adventure in my life.

Roger: You'll have to do it.
Edwina Cutwater: Do what?
Roger: You know, take it out.
Edwina Cutwater: Take what out?
Roger: The little fireman.
Edwina Cutwater: The little fireman?
Roger: You know, my penis.
Edwina Cutwater: How dare you say penis to a dead person.

Turbo: You owe me seven dollars man.
Franco: For what?
Turbo: For teaching you how to dance sucker.