Best comedy movie quotes of 2004

Movie Quote Quiz
Mean Girls picture

Regina: I know she's kind of socially retarded and weird, but she's my friend... So, just promise me you won't make fun of her!

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Team America: World Police picture

Chris: Surprise, cockfags!

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Anchorman picture

Ron Burgundy: I don't know how to put this but I'm kind of a big deal.
Veronica Corningstone: Really.
Ron Burgundy: People know me.
Veronica Corningstone: Well, I'm very happy for you.
Ron Burgundy: I'm very important. I have many leather-bound books and my apartment smells of rich mahogany.

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Napoleon Dynamite picture

Deb: What are you drawing?
Napoleon Dynamite: A liger.
Deb: What's a liger?
Napoleon Dynamite: It's pretty much my favorite animal. It's like a lion and a tiger mixed... Bred for its skills in magic.

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Shrek 2 picture

Puss-in-Boots: Fear me, if you dare.

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Dodgeball: A True Underdog Story picture

Peter La Fleur: Don't worry so much about this Amber situation. It'll all work itself out in the end.
Justin: Thanks, Pete.
Peter La Fleur: You'll laugh at this one day. I'm laughing already.

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Scooby-Doo 2: Monsters Unleashed picture

Shaggy: We're gonna die!
Daphne: Think positively!
Shaggy: We're gonna die quickly!

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Shaun of the Dead picture

Pete: It's four in the fucking morning!
Shaun: It's Saturday!
Pete: No, it's not. It's fucking Sunday. And I've got to go to fucking work in four fucking hours 'cos every other fucker in my fucking department is fucking ill! Now can you see why I'm SO FUCKING ANGRY?!
Ed: Fuck, yeah!

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A Cinderella Story picture

Sam: We're supposed to be conserving water, we're in the middle of a drought.
Fiona: Droughts are for poor people. Do you think J.Lo has a brown lawn? People who use extra water have extra class!

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Ocean's Twelve picture

Linus Caldwell: What did I say?
Danny Ocean: You called his niece a whore.
Rusty Ryan: A very cheap one.
Danny Ocean: She's seven.

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Bridget Jones: The Edge of Reason picture

Mark Darcy: Would you step outside please?
Daniel Cleaver: I'm afraid it's not possible.
Mark Darcy: Look are you gonna step outside or do I have to drag you?
Daniel Cleaver: I think you're gonna have to drag me.

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Eurotrip picture

Cooper: This sucks. I can't believe I'm the only one who didn't hook up while we were here. Europe is officially the worst country on earth.

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Harold and Kumar Go to White Castle picture

Kumar: Dad, come on.
Dr. Patel: Daddy is not coming on anything!

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14

Saved! (2004)

Saved! picture

Pastor Skip: I think the Christian thing to do would be to let them stay.
Hilary Faye: The Christian thing to do? I have been doing the CHRISTIAN THING my whole life! I did not have sex with a gay and try to blame it on Jesus!
Mary: Hilary Faye...
Hilary Faye: Oh, shut up, you fornicator!

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Lemony Snicket's A Series of Unfortunate Events picture

Count Olaf: I must say, you're a gloomy looking bunch. Why are you so glum?
Klaus Baudelaire: Our parents just died.
Count Olaf: [nonchalantly.] Ah, yes. How very dreadful. Wait, let me do that one more time. Give me the line again while it's fresh in my mind.
Klaus Baudelaire: Our parents just died?
[Olaf pretends to be shocked.].

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Around the World in 80 Days picture

Passepartout: I'm your new valet.
Phileas Fogg: Uh... I must commend the valet service on their impeccable foresight. But they know I only accept French valets.
Passepartout: Yes. Oh! Oui! Oui! I come from a long line of French valets. On my father's side. Very, very French.
Phileas Fogg: But your accent.
Passepartout: My father French. Never speak. My mother Chinese and never shuts up. All the children pick up her accent.

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The SpongeBob Squarepants Movie picture

Mrs. Puff: We paid 9 dollars to see this?
Sandy Cheeks: I paid 10.

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Without a Paddle picture

[A big grizzly bear has just appeared from the forest and is standing right in front of Tom, Dan and Jerry.]
Dan: What are you doing?
Jerry: I'm taking off my shoes.
Dan: Why?
Jerry: Because I run faster with no shoes.
Dan: You can't outrun that bear.
Jerry: I don't have to outrun the bear. I just have to outrun you.

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The Perfect Score picture

Anna: Okay, hypothetical situation: You're driving, it's late, you get to a red light in the middle of nowhere. Do you run the light? You see? You don't. You wait. Because a victimless crime is still a crime. It isn't worth it.
Kyle: Maybe it is. Maybe I run it. It depends.
Anna: On what?
Kyle: Am I trying to get somewhere important?

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Starsky & Hutch picture

Jeff: Who are you guys?
Hutch: My name's Kansas. And this is my little man, Toto.

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Quantom X
Wimbledon picture

Carl Colt: [Enters betting shop.] Twenty pounds to win, Ajay Bhatt.
Vijay: Hold on, isn't he playing your brother?
Bookmaker: You should be ashamed of yourself.
Carl Colt: Yeah, but curiously, I'm not.

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Layer Cake picture

[Dragan is threatening XXXX over the phone.]
XXXX: Dragan, I've got an idea. Why don't you come round for breakfast? I'll squeeze some orange juice and grind some coffee and we can talk about this like adults. How does that sound?
Dragan: Sounds very hospitable.
XXXX: Do you know where I live?
Dragan: No.
XXXX: Well fuck off, then.
[Hangs up.].

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Walking Tall picture

Ray: This place is full of fake tits and real assholes.

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oddy knocky
The Whole Ten Yards picture

Oz: What, no Jewish prayer before we have our ham and cheese?
Jimmy: You got a problem with my religiosity, Oz? Do unto others before you turn into a pillar of salt.
Jill: Exactly. Unless they're a rat. Then you can shoot them in the eyes.
Oz: A pillar of salt?
Jimmy: That's right. Moses said that. Read the bible, Oz.

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