Best comedy movie quotes of 1988

Roger Rabbit: No! Not my Jessica! Not pattycake! It can't be! It just can't be! Jessica's my wife! It's absolutely impossible! Jessica's the love of my life. The apple of my eye. The cream in my coffee.
Eddie Valiant: Well you better start drinking it black, Acme's taking the cream now.

Jack Walsh: Here come two words for you: shut the fuck up.

[Beetlejuice angrily kicks a model tree and it falls over.]
Beetlejuice: Nice fucking model!

Billy: Here, take this. [Hands Josh a handful of money.]
Josh: Billy, where did you get this?
Billy: From my dad's top drawer.
Josh: You stole money from your father?
Billy: It's his emergency money.
Josh: Jesus, Billy.
Billy: Well what do you call this?

Willow: What are you doing?
Madmartigan: I found some blackroot. She loves it.
Willow: Blackroot? I am the father of two children and you never, ever give a baby blackroot.
Madmartigan: Well my mother raised us on blackroot. It's good for you. Puts hair on your chest. Doesn't it, Sticks?
Willow: Her name is not Sticks. She's Elora Danan, the future empress of Tir Asleen and the last thing she's gonna want is a hairy chest.

Jane: How about a rain check?
Frank: Well, let's just stick to dinner.

Sultan: What about the virgins?
Horatio Jackson: Please, forget the virgins. We're out of virgins.

Young C.C.: Hit it Toots.

Skip: What's our record, Larry?
Larry: Eight and sixteen.
Skip: Eight... and sixteen. How'd we ever win eight?
Larry: It's a miracle.
Skip: It's a miracle. This... is a simple game. You throw the ball. You hit the ball. You catch the ball. You got it?

Doug: Coughlin's law: never tell tales about a woman, she'll hear you no matter how far away she is.

Queen Aoleon: Put a sock in it Joffe, the boy's in love.

Chet: Bear... bear... Big Bear... big bear chase meeeeeeee....

Heather Chandler: You were nothing before you met me. You were playing Barbies with Betty Finn. You were a Bluebird. You were a Brownie. You were a Girl Scout Cookie.

Angela de Marco: I've got to help Joey with his homework. He's having a lot of trouble in school.
Connie Russo: Of course he's having trouble at school, he hangs out with Tony Jr. Face it, these boys are never going to be Einstein.

Dodger: All right, you guys. If Mr. Sykes don't see some cold, hard cash, we are Doberman chow.

Vincent: Women love men who are mysterious and devious, keeps them on their toes, it excites them. You know what I mean?
Julius: No.
Vincent: You do like women?
Julius: Oh, very much so. They're strange and sensitive. They have compassion. I have the highest respect for women.
Vincent: You're a virgin!
Julius: That's private.
Vincent: A 230-pound virgin.

Cynthia: Whaddya need speech class for, ya talk fine.

Brad: Look.
Megan Morgan: Where are they all going?
Brad: I don't know. Looks like some kind of critter convention.

Claire Phillips: That's the one good thing about regret: it's never too late. You can always change tomorrow if you want to.

Farmer Gene Green: Where's my dog! Where's my Pooh Bear.