The Stranger: Let's proceed with caution. These madmen could eat us.
The Time Traveller: They liked your hair.
The Stranger: Of course, I'm a writer. Writer's always have good hair.
Mr. Crummles: Happiness is a gift and the trick is not to expect it, but to delight in it when it comes.
Billy Flynn: Now look, I don't like to blow my own horn. But believe me. If Jesus Christ lived in Chicago today and if he had $5,000 and he'd come to me, things would have turned out differently.
Flying Snow: How swift thy sword.
Denton Van Zan: Envy the country that has heroes, huh? I say pity the country that needs them.
Joe Enders: Stay on my ass.
Meowth: There they go. All we gotta do is follow them on top of them rooftops.
James: Well, I used to be quite a good gymnast.
Jessie: This is our big chance, I could almost taste it! Are you ready?
James: Yeah.
Sy Parrish: And if these pictures have anything important to say to future generations, it's this: I was here. I existed. I was young, I was happy, and someone cared enough about me in this world to take my picture.
Jake Hayes: Does it play DVDs?
Seale: No. It's a portable thermonucular (sic) bomb.
Conspiracy Brother: Jesus Christ: black man. Babe Ruth: black man. Madonna: ... slept with black men.
Charlie Kaufman: To begin... To begin... How to start? I'm hungry. I should get coffee. Coffee would help me think. Maybe I should write something first, then reward myself with coffee. Coffee and a muffin. Okay, so I need to establish the themes. Maybe a banana-nut. That's a good muffin.
Valerie Gipson: Whatever drama you've gotten yourself into, it's just the kind of thing that always happens to you. And it never happens to me unless I am in your field of gravity.
Frank Martin: All right, that's enough juice for now.
Frankie Delano: You ever read this book?
Bruno: Have I ever read that book? Not only does that insult my intelligence but it insults my ignorance. Why would a man like me, who happens to like himself, be caught dead reading a bit of boy toy fluff like that?
Frankie Delano: Because it's a killer.
Connor: I don't know what it is she's afraid of. It's like she always thinks the bottom will drop out.
Vivi: I think you know why she thinks that, don't you, honey? Because it did. It always did.
Diego Rivera: Thank you.
Frida Kahlo: For what?
Diego Rivera: For making a fat, old, crazy Communist a happy man.
Catherine: Suzon, I forgot one thing. I heard a strange sound. I looked through Augustine's keyhole, and I saw her standing at the mirror with something shiny. I thought nothing of it, but now I'm sure she was sharpening a knife.
Augustine: You liar! I was holding my mother-of-pearl comb and cleaning it.
Gaby: At 3:00 am?
Augustine: Combs never sleep.
Dr. Ben Sobel: I am grieving. It's a process.