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War: What is this? Where are my brothers!?

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Angel Soldier: Judgment approaches.

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Narrator: Since the dawn of time, the armies of Heaven and Hell have waged an endless war. Drawn to the conflict was the Charred Council, an entity bound by ancient laws to preserve order and balance. It held that any great power, unchecked, threatened the very fabric of the universe. In time, Heaven and Hell came to honor the Council and its laws, for none were beyond the swift and terrible justice of the Council's enforcers... a fearsome brotherhood known as the Four Horsemen. Amid the turmoil, the first humans emerged. The Council foretold that these weak, but cunning creatures would someday be integral to the Balance. Thus, the third kingdom was named... the Kingdom of Man. By order of the Council, a truce was forged between Heaven and Hell. The great pact was bound by Seven Seals, to be broken at the appointed time... when Man's Kingdom stood ready for the End War... a battle that would bring balance and determine the ultimate fate of the three kingdoms.

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The Choking Grounds Gatekeeper: Ancestors praise you.

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The Watcher: I always knew you had it in you.

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The Watcher: Now that was entertaining! Can we do it again?

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The Watcher: Surely this is no challenge for the likes of you?

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The Choking Grounds Gatekeeper: Hmmmm
War: I have come for the Destroyer.
The Choking Grounds Gatekeeper: My brother spoke of your coming. But a powerful curse holds me now... I cannot help you.
War: Any curse can be broken.
The Choking Grounds Gatekeeper: Yes... Perhaps... These servants of the Destroyer walk unseen within the Realm of Shadow. By their blood we are bound... By their blood shall we be free.
War: I can no longer move within the Shadow Realm. Much of my power has left me.
The Choking Grounds Gatekeeper: You need not enter it! I will grant you the power to see into the accursed realm, for a time... But, to what end? What hope have we now against the Destroyer's foul sorcery?
War: Hope will not bring you freedom.
The Choking Grounds Gatekeeper: Yes.

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Vulgrim: Nice sword.

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Vulgrim: You drive too hard a bargain, friend.

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Vulgrim: Samael has returned you in once piece... He must like you. Muhmhmhm.

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Bob Callahan: You know what, don't touch me when we're on a truce. It's very patronizing.
Jerry Pierce: Yeah, it's a little weird for me too. (00:27:50)

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Hoagie: We gotta join forces. We get Jerry now... or we die.
Bob Callahan: What?
Hoagie: Eventually, you know what I mean. (00:06:35)

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Batman and Robin - S1-E19

Nostalgia Critic: A Bat... Credit Card?.. They gave him a Bat... Credit Card? They had the balls... to give one of the greatest superheroes of all time... A bat... credit card? nooo! nooo! Does not compute! Does not compute. (00:08:25)

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Quinn McKenna: Look, I get it. Something went down in Mexico. Nobody wants any witnesses.
VA Psych: I need to know if you pose a threat.
Quinn McKenna: I'm a sniper. Isn't posing a threat kind of the fucking point?

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Leeson: What's your name?
Nancy: gangster.
Leeson: Oh come on, you know I was kidding yesterday.
Nancy: Yours?
Leeson: Huh? Don't you remember, I told you. It's Leeson.
[Nancy looks at his name tag.]
Nancy: Mohammed Salaami...?
Leeson:...It's my stage name.
Nancy: Stolen?
Leeson: It was not...I found it.
Nancy: You sure don't look like a salaami. (00:46:35)

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Lin Dong: He's not a normal thief. (01:08:25)

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Leeson: Uuggh. Can you give me water and food please? I'm so dehydrated I can't even pee. (01:02:20)

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Woman in Black: You know you're really starting to piss me off. (00:52:15)

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[Leeson fails at looking intimidating with fake Kung Fu and the bullies start to beat him up].
Bully: Who do you think you are, Jackie Chan? (00:42:25)

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