Best comedy movie quotes of 2008

Tropic Thunder picture

Byong: We no get money yet. Price now 100 million. You pay now, or tomorrow Simple Jack Die!
Les Grossman: Great. Let me get this down. 100 million... Oh, wait! I got a better idea. Instead of a hundred million, how about I send you a hobo's dick cheese? Then, you kill him. Do your thing, skin the fucking bastard. Go to town, man. Go to town! In the mean time and as usual, go fuck yourself.

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Step Brothers picture

Dale Doback: The clown has no penis!

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Burn After Reading picture

CIA Superior: What did we learn, Palmer?
CIA Officer: I don't know, sir.
CIA Superior: I don't fuckin' know either. I guess we learned not to do it again.
CIA Officer: Yes, sir.
CIA Superior: I'm fucked if I know what we did.

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In Bruges picture

Ray: One gay beer for my gay friend, one normal beer for me because I am normal.

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Kung Fu Panda picture

Master Oogway: There is a saying: Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery, but today is a gift. That is why it is called the present.

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27 Dresses picture

Jane: That was yesterday. Today you're just the bitch who broke my heart and cut up my mother's wedding dress.

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Yes Man picture

Allison: The world's a playground. You know that when you are a kid, but somewhere along the way everyone forgets it.

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Mamma Mia! picture

Harry Bright: Bugger.
Sam Carmichael: My sentiments exactly.

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Angus, Thongs and Perfect Snogging picture

Robbie: I wrote a song about you.
Georgia Nicolson: Really?!
Robbie: Yeah. It's called "Bitch in Uniform."

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10

Wall-E (2008)

Wall-E picture

Captain: I don't want to survive. I want to live!

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The Wrestler picture

Randy 'The Ram' Robinson: The only place I get hurt is out there. The world don't give a shit about me.

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My Best Friend's Girl picture

Tank: [sitting watching "Ghost" and crying.] God, I'm a fag.

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Role Models picture

Danny: Can I get a large black coffee?
Barista: A what?
Danny: Large black coffee.
Barista: Do you mean a venti?
Danny: No, I mean a large.
Barista: Venti is large.
Danny: No venti is twenty. Large is large. In fact tall is large and grande is spanish for large. Venti is the only one that doesn't mean large. It's also the only one that's Italian. Congratulations, you're stupid in three languages.
Barista: A venti is a large coffee.
Danny: Really says who: Fellini? Do you accept Lira, or is it all Euros now?

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Horton Hears a Who picture

Katie: In my world everyone is a pony, and they all eat rainbows, and poop butterflies.

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High School Musical 3: Senior Year picture

Troy Bolton: East High is a place where teachers encouraged us to break the status quo and define ourselves as we choose. Where a jock can cook up a mean crème brulee, and a brainiac can break it down on the dance floor. It's a place where one person, if it's the right person, changes us all. East High is having friends we'll keep for the rest of our lives, and that means we really are 'all in this together'. Once a Wildcat, always a Wildcat!

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Bedtime Stories picture

Marty Bronson: Your fun is only limited by your imagination.

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You Don't Mess with the Zohan picture

Exec 1: What's 'humus'?
Exec 2: It's a very tasty diarrhoea-like substance.

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Meet the Spartans picture

Leonidas: Adjust you sword boy, it's digging into my back.
Sonio: But I'm not wearing my sword.
Leonidas: [Pause.] Carry on then.

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Get Smart picture

Maxwell Smart: Are you thinking what I'm thinking?
The Chief: I don't know. Were you thinking "Holy shit, holy shit! A swordfish almost went through my head"? Because if you are, then we're on the same page.

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Vicky Cristina Barcelona picture

Juan Antonio: Well, now that the day's almost over, is it reasonable of me to ask you if you'll both join me in my room?
Vicky: Oh, come on, I thought we'd settled that.
Cristina: Vicky's just trying to say that she's engaged to be married, that's all.
Juan Antonio: Great. Then these are her last days of freedom.
Vicky: No. Look, I'm not free. I'm committed. You know what my theory is? And when I drink, I get brutally frank. I think that you're still hurting from the failure of your marriage to Maria Elena, and you're trying to lose yourself in empty sex.
Juan Antonio: Empty sex? Do you have such a low opinion of yourself?

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Zack & Miri Make a Porno picture

Miriam Linky: Nobody wants to see us fuck, Zack!
Zack: EVERYBODY wants to see ANYBODY fuck. I hate Rosie O'Donell, but if somebody said "I got a tape of Rosie O'Donell getting fucked stupid" I'd be like "Why the fuck aren't we watching that right now?"

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Harold & Kumar Escape from Guantanamo Bay picture

Kumar Patel: I've never sucked a dick before. I bet it sucks dick!

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Baby Mama picture

Angie Ostrowiski: Stop framing your face.
Kate Holbrook: I think it works.
Angie Ostrowiski: It doesn't.

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Marley & Me picture

John Grogan: A dog doesn't care if you're rich or poor, educated or illiterate, clever or dull. Give him your heart and he will give you his.

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Hancock picture

Hancock: Call me an asshole, one more time.

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Sex and the City: The Movie picture

Mr. Big: I will love you forever, Ever Thine, Ever Mine, Ever Ours.

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Forgetting Sarah Marshall picture

Dwayne the Bartender: He turned down a blow job from his ex-girlfriend. You know what that does to a man? It's called blue balls. He's like Gandhi! But better - he likes puppets!

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Pineapple Express picture

Dale: Saul, help me! Help me! He's punching my bum!

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Madagascar: Escape 2 Africa picture

Gloria: Found any water yet?
Moto Moto: No, just more diamonds and gold.

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Definitely, Maybe picture

Will: I never told you the happy ending.
Maya: What is it?
Will: You.

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