Blade: You better wake up. The world you live in is just a sugar coated topping. There is another world beneath it. The real world. And if you want to survive it, you better learn to pull the trigger.
Goon: What the fuck is this?
[Picks up a bowling ball hesitatingly.]
The Dude: Obviously you're not a golfer.
Ted: I couldn't believe that she knew my name. Some of my best friends didn't know my name.
Prince Henry: I have been born to privilege, and with that comes specific obligations.
Leonardo da Vinci: Horseshit.
Lee Butters: You have the right to remain silent. So shut the fuck up. You have the right to an attorney. If you can't afford an attorney, we will provide you with the dumbest fucking lawyer on Earth. If you hire Johnny Cochrane, I'll kill you!
Truman Burbank: Good morning! And in case I don't see you, good afternoon, good evening, and good night!
Queen Elizabeth: Have her then, but you're a lordly fool: she's been plucked since I saw her last, and not by you. Takes a woman to know it.
Emperor: The flower that blooms in adversity is the most rare and beautiful of all.
Emperor: You don't meet a girl like that every dynasty.
Eddie: Oh, and if Tom or anyone else for that matter feels like givin' them a bit of a kickin', I'm sure it won't do any harm.
Soap: Yeah, little bit of pain never hurt anybody. If you know what I mean. Also, I think knives are a good idea. Big, fuck-off shiny ones. Ones that look like they could skin a crocodile. Knives are good, because they don't make any noise, and the less noise they make, the more likely we are to use them. Shit 'em right up. Makes it look like we're serious. Guns for show, knives for a pro.
Tom: Soap, is there something we should know about you?
Bacon: I'm not sure what's more worrying. The job or your past.
Patch Adams: You treat a disease, you win, you lose. You treat a person, I guarantee you, you'll win, no matter what the outcome.
Person in Theatre: Do you mind?
Frank Navasky: A hotdog is singing. You need quiet while a hotdog is singing?
Miriam: There can be miracles, when you believe Though hope is frail, it's hard to kill Who knows what miracles you can achieve When you believe, somehow you will You will when you believe.