Best comedy movie quotes of 1995

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Movie Quote Quiz
Ace Ventura: When Nature Calls picture

Ace: Tell them what I'm saying. [To Wachootoo tribe] I come in peace.
Ouda: White devil say, "I will harm you."
Ace: I couldn't help but notice that Eqinsu Ocha part. Did you just refer to me as White Devil?
Ouda: This how they know you.
Ace: Leave that part out from now on. [To tribe] I represent the princess.
Ouda: I am a princess.
Ace: War is hell. The last thing we want is a fight.
Ouda: I want to fight. So go to Hell.

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Dracula: Dead and Loving It picture

[Renfield is being seduced by Dracula's brides.]
Renfield: This is wrong. Do you hear me? Wrong. This is...WRONG ME! WRONG ME! WRONG MY BRAINS OUT!

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Friday picture

Smokey: I got mind control over Debo. When he here, I be quiet, but when he leave, I be talkin' again.

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Toy Story picture

Buzz: I just want you to know that although you tried to terminate me, revenge is not an idea we promote on my planet.
Woody: Oh, well, that's good.
Buzz: But we're not on my planet, are we?
Woody: No.

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Now and Then picture

Teeny: Chrissy, truth or dare?
Chrissy: Truth.
Teeny: Have you ever been french kissed?
Chrissy: Are you kidding? I don't want to get pregnant!
Roberta: You can't get pregnant from french-kissing!
Chrissy: I know that, beetle-brain, but it's common knowledge that if you tongue-kiss a boy, he automatically thinks you'll do the deed with him. They can't help it. They're driven. It's the male curse.

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Jumanji picture

[Alan is explaining to Sarah why Van Pelt is chasing him.]
Sarah: Well, have you ever thought about sitting down and talking about your differences?
Alan: What are you, crazy? The man has a gun.
Sarah: Don't ever call me crazy, Alan. Ever. Because everyone in this town has been calling me crazy ever since I told the cops you were sucked into a board game.

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Man of the House picture

Chet Bronski: Well, we're all part of the same tribe.
Jack Sturgess: Right, the Minotauk.
Chet Bronski: No, I'm referring to the emotionally-constipated American male over 40.

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Sabrina picture

Sabrina: Paris is always a good idea.

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Casper picture

Kat: Drop dead.
Stretch: Too late.

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Major Payne picture

Cadet Stone: If I'm the new squad leader, then my first order is to SCREW YOU, SIR!
Major Payne: What'd you say to me turd?
Cadet Stone: Why don't you go back to hell where you came from?
Major Payne: Boy, I am five seconds from being on you like white on rice with a glass of milk on a paper plate in a snowstorm. I'll put my foot so far up your ass the water on my knee will quench your thirst.
Cadet Stone: Try it.

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Tommy Boy picture

Tommy: You know a lot of people go to college for seven years.
Richard: I know. They're called doctors.

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Canadian Bacon picture

Kabral: The black guy always dies. Think about it, man. Unforgiven. Alien. Rocky IV. The Shining.
Roy: Star Trek II. Forrest Gump. Witness.
Bud: Annie Hall. Not Annie Hall.
Roy: No, Night of the Living Dead.
Bud: That's the one!
Kabral: And what about that brother in Jurassic Park, man?
Bud: There were two black guys who died in that one. That was a twofer. You must be really pissed off at that one.

Bishop73
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To Wong Foo, Thanks for Everything, Julie Newmar picture

Vida Boheme: I think tomorrow is a "Say Something" hat day.

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French Kiss picture

Kate: Spasm! Spasm! Oh, God, here it comes... lactose intolerance.

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Heavyweights picture

Tony Perkis: Attention campers. Lunch has been cancelled due to lack of hustle. Deal with it.

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Houseguest picture

Ron Timmerman: I wash my balls religiously. I like 'em so clean you can just feel every dimple.
Kevin Franklin: Thank you for sharing that.
Ron: The cleaner the ball, the better the play. Especially when you pull out that wood. The quicker you get it into the hole with the least amount of strokes, the better, right?
Kevin: Are you trying to tell me something?
Ron: Let me wash your balls.

Bishop73
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Nine Months picture

Dr. Kosevich: I've got it! Nurse, call the Anesthesiologist, this woman needs an enema.
Samuel, Rebecca, Nurse: An enema?
Dr. Kosevich: No, uh, she needs a pedicure.
Nurse: This ain't no goddam beauty parlor.
Dr. Kosevich: Epitath.
Samuel Faulkner: She's not dead, you moron.
Dr. Kosevich: Epidermus... Uh.
Rebecca Taylor: Epidural, asshole.

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Bad Boys picture

Marcus Burnett: You see what happens when you go off without me? You get into shit.
Mike Lowrey: Oh please, like shit don't happen when you're there.
Marcus Burnett: That - that ain't the point.

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It Takes Two picture

Diane Barrows: It was there, I know it, that can't-eat, can't-sleep, reach-for-the-stars, over - the-fence, World Series kind of stuff.

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Tank Girl picture

Tank Girl: You gotta think of it like...the first time you got laid. You just gotta go 'Daddy, are you sure this is right?'.

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