Woman: What's a mother to do? Lazy brat sits in her room all day, sewing dolls. Children misbehaving in the basement! And one in the wall, doing his business God knows where. You kids will be the death of me... the death of me.
Pappas: Listen you snot-nose little shit, I was takin' shrapnel in Khe Sanh when you were crappin' in your hands and rubbin' it on your face.
Jack Crawford: Believe me, you do not want Hannibal Lecter inside your head.
Martin: We all forget things. That's what reminding is for.
Captain James T. Kirk: Spock, you want to know something? Everybody's human.
Captain Spock: I find that remark... Insulting.
Mr. Guttman: Hello, Dr. Marvin. The house looks good.
Mrs. Guttman: Burn in hell, Dr. Marvin.
Claire: Look, Mack, I don't even know what I'm gonna say from one second to the next. The world doesn't make any sense to me any more. What's going on? There are babies lying around in the streets. There are people living in boxes. There are people ready to shoot you if you look at them. And we're getting used to it. The world is so nuts, it makes me wonder about all the choices that we've made.
Cdr. Camparelli: But if I catch either one of you shitting in some vital area on my ship, I will have you keelhauled! And that's serious on an aircraft carrier.
Nancy Lee Nicholson: Is that a star?
Hank Gordon: No, that's Ted Danson.
Dani: I wanna know you.
Court Foster: You do know me.
Dani: I wanna know you more... I wanna know you all I can.
Court Foster: What do you wanna know?
Dani: I wanna know... your hopes.
Court Foster: Well... I hope your boobs will get bigger and your butt will fill out.
Zorro: I was promised seven bags of rice to turn you into mince meat and put you in a pie.
Fievel: Have no fear. Filly the Kid is here.
Bryan: I'd respect your privacy more if you weren't so secretive.
Sue Ellen "Swell" Crandell: Well I'd tell you more if you didn't want to know so much.
Elizabeth: Go away!
Drop Dead Fred: Go away? Why do you want me to go away? Fine! Say the magic words and I'll piss off.
Elizabeth: Piss off!
Drop Dead Fred: Ha! Gotcha. Those weren't the magic words.
Polly: What did you say?
Drop Dead Fred: She told you to piss off.
Detective Mastrionotti: Started in Kansas City. Couple of housewives.
Detective Deutsch: Couple days ago we see the same M.O. out in Los Feliz.
Detective Mastrionotti: Doctor. Ear, nose and throat man.
Detective Deutsch: All of which he's now missin'.
Detective Mastrionotti: Well, some of his throat was there.
Detective Deutsch: Physician, heal thyself.
Detective Mastrionotti: Good luck with no fuckin' head.
Detective Deutsch: Anyway.
Daniel Miller: Is this Heaven?
Bob Diamond: No, it isn't Heaven.
Daniel Miller: Is it Hell?
Bob Diamond: Nope, it isn't Hell either. Actually, there is no Hell. Although I hear Los Angeles is getting pretty close.
George: Who presents this woman? This woman? But she's not a woman. She's just a kid. And she's leaving us. I realised at that moment that I was never going to come home again and see Annie at the top of the stairs. Never going to see her again at our breakfast table in her nightgown and socks. I suddenly realised what was happening. Annie was all grown up and was leaving us, and something inside began to hurt.