Linda La Hughes: There aint no such thing as bisexuality, it's just greediness.
Hank: Calm down, Boomhauer! I can't understand a word you're saying.
Tiger Woods: I always wanted to say this... fa-shizzle.
Sonic the Hedgehog: I don't see why we have to learn all this etiquette baloney.
Christopher 'Chris' Thorndyke: My mom says it's important to learn good manners so we can eat properly.
Sonic the Hedgehog: Well, I never learned anything about manners, and I been eating my whole life.
Lucy Ricardo: How much do you want to bet?
Fred Mertz: Ten dollars.
Ethel Mertz: Well what's the matter with twenty dollars?
Ricky Ricardo: What's the matter with thirty dollars?
Lucy Ricardo: What's the matter with fifty dollars?
Fred Mertz: What was the matter with ten dollars?
Squiggy: I woulda worn my tuxedo but my polo pony ate it.
Jed Clampett: Boy, I'm gonna give you 24 hours to clean up all this mess.
Jethro: Aw come on, Uncle Jed. I'm gonna clean up. I'm gonna set this world on fire.
Jed Clampett: You're gonna clean up all right. Everything. Or you're gonna end up with the seat of your britches on fire.
Filburt: You turn the page, wash your hands. Turn the page, wash your hands. Turn the page, wash your hands.
Mork's Mixed Emotions - S1-E20
Orson: You opened the door to your emotions, didn't you?
Mork: Yes, Sir.
Orson: You realise you've broken the highest Orkan law. It is my duty to report you to the Council.
Mork: I understand. But I don't regret what I've done, sir. You see, for the first time in my life, I feel really alive, I feel fantastic! Oh, I wish you could try it! I wish you could feel some of the things I've been feeling!
Orson: Impossible. I could never do that. They'd throw me in prison.
Mork: Oh, I don't mean to be disrespectful, your immenseness, but until you can marvel at a rainbow after a storm or rejoice at seeing a baby walk for the first time, or hold someone and have them feel the same warmth inside as you feel close to them outside - until you can do these things, aren't you already in prison?
Sarah Walker: Come any closer, I shoot.
John Casey: You shoot him, I shoot you, I leave both your bodies here and go out for a late night snack. I'm thinking maybe pancakes.
Olive Snook: Yesterday, a farrier named Lucas Shoemaker was found dead. Trampled.
Emerson Cod: Why should I care about a dude that sells fur coats?
Olive Snook: Not a furrier, a farrier. Heir.
Emerson Cod: Fair-rier?
Olive Snook: It's a blacksmith. Puts shoes on horses.
Emerson Cod: Don't try to act like that's a word everybody knows.
Blaine Edwards: This title gets the around the world and back snap.
Michael Westen: You say tomato, I say pimp.
Shawn Spencer: Good morning detectives, collecting money for the Policeman's ball?
Carlton Lassiter: We don't have balls.
Shawn Spencer: I honestly have no response to that.
Wayne Arnold: Butthead.
Lord Bowler: Uh oh. You hit the sheriff.
Brisco County Jr.: Yeah, but I did not hit the deputy.
Kessler: Who are you?
Remington Steele: Just a happy go lucky tourist out to see a bit of the world.
Neff: Is that why you've got five passports, from five different countries, in five different names?
Remington Steele: Kept trying for a good picture.
Jeff: I love the word naked, it's brilliant isn't it, 'naked'. When I was a kid I used to write the word naked on a bit of paper hundreds of times and rub my face in it.
Christmas Special 1974 (a.k.a. A Perfect Christmas) - S8-E7
Harold: You're so xenophobic.
Albert: No I'm not, I just don't like foreigners.
Josh Nichols: Mom and Dad are gonna kill us.
Drake Parker: No they won't... they are gonna kill you.