Best comedy TV quotes of 2003

Lilo: Stitch! Are you okay?
Stitch: I'm okay. I'm fluffy.

Frankenstein and the Horny Villagers - S2-E8

Berta: Well gadzooks! Zippy's got his freak on.
Charlie: Yeah he has.
Berta: Well if they can put a man on the moon they can put a woman on your brother. (00:03:04)

Ssiscool ★

Deputy Travis Junior: Getting two tickets to an execution is like getting two tickets to NASCAR, except you know Jeff Gordon's gonna die.

Pilot - S1-E1

Michael: They're going to keep Dad in jail until this whole thing gets sorted out. [Silence.] Also, I've been told that the company's expense accounts have been frozen. [Gasps.] Interesting. I would have expected that after "they're keeping Dad in jail."

Caleb Nichol: I've come to ask a favor.
Sandy: I'm sorry, what did you say?
Caleb Nichol: You didn't hear me?
Sandy: No, I heard you, I... I just want to make you say it again.

Tiger Woods: I always wanted to say this... fa-shizzle.

Sonic the Hedgehog: I don't see why we have to learn all this etiquette baloney.
Christopher 'Chris' Thorndyke: My mom says it's important to learn good manners so we can eat properly.
Sonic the Hedgehog: Well, I never learned anything about manners, and I been eating my whole life.

Male Receptionist: Oh, boy. Where to begin... where to begin? First of all, fatty, I'm not bowing down to anyone. Second of all, unless you're here for a supermodel audition you're not seeing anyone's master. Third of all, shoo.

George: Yuck! This juice tastes like ass, here you try it.
Mason: No, thanks. I'm trying to stay off the ass juice for now.

Meera: Instead of sugar use artificial sweetener in tea.
Marjorie Dawes: Summin' about sugar.

Bam Margera: Don't be a pussy Phil.

Dr. Venture: Dean! Have you been shooting dope into your scrotum? You can tell me! I'm hip.

Gore Vidal: We have to move out, not on. We have no business there. We didn't care before what Iraq became and we don't care now.

Leonardo: Um, ladies and gentlemen. We have an emergency situation. Everyone needs to get to the escape pods now!
[No response.]
Raphael: How do you say 'bomb' in Futurese?
[General panic.].

Kate Fox: Sometimes confronting the past is the only way to move on.