Jessica Harrison: If I'd wanted your help, mate, I would've asked for it.
The Lord of Darkness: You think you have won! What is light without dark? What are you without me? I am a part of you all. You can never defeat me. We are brothers eternal.
Luther Heggs: Calm? Do "murder" and "calm" go together? Calm and murder? Murder?
Rachel: Well, you don't look like a bodyguard.
Frank: What'd you expect?
Rachel: Well, I don't know, maybe a tough guy?
Frank: This is my disguise.
Gaston: How can you read this? There's no pictures!
Belle: Well, some people use their imagination.
Mrs. Thompson: A strange wang right in my palm.
Marilla Cuthbert: Every baby is the sweetest and the best.
Terry Fields: Jesus, what a night.
Lilly: She is not a Christian. My mama said hollering in a church doesn't make you a Christian any more than standing in a garage makes you a Cadillac.
Eve: How can you've lived for so long and still not get it? This self obsession is a waste of living. It could be spend in surviving things, appreciating nature, nurturing kindness and friendship, and dancing. You have been pretty lucky in love though, if I may say so.
Jack Burton: Hey, I'm a reasonable guy. But I've just experienced some very unreasonable things.
Red Webster: Don't ever marry an ugly woman. Just sucks the life right out of you.
Duke Henry: I am Henry the Red, Duke of Shale, Lord of the Northlands and leader of its people.
Ash: Well hellooo Mister Fancypants. I've got news for you pal, you ain't leading but two things right now: Jack and shit... And Jack just left town.
Romeo: Why then, O brawling love, O loving hate, O anything, of nothing first create! O heavy lightness, serious vanity, Misshapen chaos of well-seeming forms, Feather of lead, bright smoke, cold fire, sick health, Still-waking sleep, that is not what it is!
Charlie: Ten more seconds and I'm leaving! Ten-
Roxanne: What did you say?
Charlie: I said ten more seconds and I'm leaving.
Roxanne: Oh.
Charlie: What did you think I said?
Roxanne: I thought you said earn more sessions by sleeving.
Charlie: What does that mean?
Roxanne: I don't know. That's why I came out.
Jenna: You are rude, and mean, and sloppy, and frizzy - and I don't like you at all.
Meredith Morton: I hope I'm not putting anyone out.
Amy Stone: Me. You're putting, me out.
Chris: I can't hear you Samantha. I can't hear you. OH! Lightbulb.