Henry: I saw her ankles.
Captain Jack Sparrow: You would've seen a lot more if you kept your cakehole shut.
Harry Stamper: You got any more bullets in that gun, Sharp?
Frau Farbissina: Remember when we froze your semen? You said that if it looked like you weren't coming back we should try to make you a son so that a part of you could live forever?
Dr. Evil: Oh, sure.
Frau Farbissina: Well, after a couple of years, we got a little impatient. Dr. Evil, I want you to meet your son.
Dr. Evil: My son?
Frau Farbissina: Ja. SCOTT!
Ivana Humpalot: My name is Ivana. Ivana Humpalot.
Austin Powers: Excuse me?
Ivana Humpalot: Ivana Humpalot.
Austin: And I want a toilet made out of solid gold, but it's just not in the cards now, is it?
Quintus Arrius: Your eyes are full of hate, forty-one. That's good. Hate keeps a man alive. It gives him strength.
Sarah: People once believed that when someone dies, a crow carries their soul to the Land of the Dead. But sometimes, something so bad happens that a terrible sadness is carried with it and the soul can not rest. Then sometimes, just sometimes, the crow can bring that soul back to put the wrong things right.
Russell Franklin: Just what the hell did you do to those sharks?
Dr. Susan McCallister: Their brains weren't large enough to harvest sufficient amounts of the protein complex. So we violated the Harvard Compact. Jim and I used gene therapies to increase their brain mass, a larger brain means more protein. As a side effect the sharks got smarter.
Janice Higgins: You stupid bitch!
Chinese Food Lady: And then?
Jesse: No "and then"!
Chinese Food Lady: And then?
Guy Fleegman: I'm not even supposed to be here! I'm just "Crewman Number Six"! I'm expendable! I'm the guy in the episode who dies to prove how serious the situation is! I've gotta get outta here!
Professor Fate: Leslie escaped?
General: With a small friar.
Professor Fate: Leslie escaped with a chicken?
Robin Monroe: If you were half a pilot, we wouldn't be on this island!
Quinn Harris: I'm the best damn pilot you're ever going to meet!
Robin Monroe: Ha! I've flown with you twice and you've crashed half the time!
Howard Payne: See, I'm in charge here! I drop this stick, and they pick your friend here up with a sponge! Are you ready to die, friend?
Harry: Fuck you!
Howard Payne: Oh! In two hundred years we've gone from "I regret but I have one life to give for my country" to "Fuck you!"?
Carlos: You son of a bitch! How could you do this? Friendship is the only choice in life you can make that's yours! You can't choose your family, God damn it - I've had to face that! And no man should be judged for whatever direction his dick goes - that's like blaming a compass for pointing north, for Christ's sake! Friendship is all we have! We chose each other. How could you fuck it up? How could you make us look so bad?
Connor: Jeez! It's a fuckin' six-shooter. Fuck!
Murphy: There's nine bodies, genius.
Connor: What the fuck were you gonna do, laugh the last three to death, Funny-Man?
Marlboro: My old man told me, before he left this shitty world, never chase buses or women, you'll always be left behind.
Lawyer: So Mr. Montgomery, are you claiming there was no bumblebee present at the time of the incident?
Earl Montgomery: No, I'm not. There was a bumblebee present, man.
Lawyer: Oh, good.
Earl Montgomery: And there were birds chirpin'. There were dogs barkin'. Hell, for all I know, there was a chipmunk in the bushes, humping a turtle! You know you gotta be careful with them chipmunks. They'll hump anything!
Anna Valerious: You ask a lot of questions.
Van Helsing: Normally I only ask two."What are we dealing with?" and "How do I kill it?"
Passepartout: I'm your new valet.
Phileas Fogg: Uh... I must commend the valet service on their impeccable foresight. But they know I only accept French valets.
Passepartout: Yes. Oh! Oui! Oui! I come from a long line of French valets. On my father's side. Very, very French.
Phileas Fogg: But your accent.
Passepartout: My father French. Never speak. My mother Chinese and never shuts up. All the children pick up her accent.
Jack Sparrow: Oi fish face! I've got a jar of dirt! I've got a jar of dirt! Guess what's inside of it?.