Nick Persons: You're the local real estate guy.
Chuck Mitchell, Jr.: I'm also the local contractor.
God: Let me ask you something. If someone prays for patience, you think God gives them patience? Or does he give them the opportunity to be patient? If he prayed for courage, does God give him courage, or does he give him opportunities to be courageous? If someone prayed for the family to be closer, do you think God zaps them with warm fuzzy feelings, or does he give them opportunities to love each other?
Annie Braddock: There's a common belief among anthropologists that you must immerse yourself in an unfamiliar world in order to truly understand your own.
Dewey Cox: Edith, I am starting to think... that maybe you don't believe in me.
Edith: I do believe in you. I just know you're gonna fail.
Rod Kimble: Have fun being married to satan.
Raphael: You're still here? Go back to your jungle.
Leonardo: At least his personality is still intact.
Ivan "Fire Urchin": Stepped on me, stepped on me? Are you kidding? This guy was dancing on me! I mean just look at this, broken, broken, gone, gone, broken, broken, broken.
Rusty Ryan: Are you all right?
Danny Ocean: Yeah, um, I just bit into a red pepper.
Rusty Ryan: Is that... Are you... Are you watching Oprah?
Lenny: You may find this hard to believe, but most of the guys here don't have a lot of experience with girls.
Francis: Cough syrup? That's a dumb way to get loaded, Jack.
Lars Lindstrom: I was hoping winter was over.
Margo: No, it's just a thaw - winter isn't over till Easter.
Melanie 'Mel' Whitfield: So, technically, you slept with Santa?
Kelli Whitfield: Well, I didn't know he was Santa at the time... but technically, I guess I did.
Melanie 'Mel' Whitfield: Well, ho, ho, ho.
Cam Wexler: Shit! Shit shit shit... pardon my French.
Charlie: I speak a little French and that sounded like "shit."
Annabelle Fritton: Daddy, you can't expect me to stay here, it's like Hogwarts for Pikeys!
Bruce Campbell: You don't know fear, kid. You've never worked with Sam Raimi.