Justin Bieber: There's gonna be times where people tell you that you can't live your dreams. This is what I tell them: Never say never.
Madea: Sit down you black leprechaun looking like you're out of a damn box of chocolate, lucky charms.
Dwayne: Sometimes fate pulls out its big ol' cock and slaps you right in the face.
Henrik Vanger: Soon you'll know us all too well, with my apologies.
Dr. Woodward: If you speak of this... Or else... you, and your parents will die. (00:23:45)
Kay: Honor is not a thing to be dismissed or forgotten.
Title Card: "The battle against the Devil, which is the principal task of Saint Michael the Archangel, is still being fought today, because the Devil is still alive and active in the world." - Pope John Paul II.
Title Card: What follows is inspired by true events.
Lord Redbrick: I'm not illiterate! My parents were married!
Esca: How can a piece of metal mean so much to you?
Marcus Aquila: The eagle is not a piece of metal. The eagle is Rome.
David Norris: All I have are the choices I make, and I choose her, come what may.
Julian Goldstein: What are you afraid of?
Marley Corbett: I'm scared this entire night's gonna go by and you'll never wanna kiss me.
Sgt. Major: At fourteen forty six pacific standard time, twelve different locations across the globe were breached in what appears to have been a coordinated attack by an unknown enemy. This is a textbook military invasion. We are the last offensive force on the west coast. We cannot lose Los Angeles.
Thadeous: I shouldn't even be here! I will probably die on this quest, and Courtney definitely will!
E.B.: Hey, wait. You're not surprised I'm a talking rabbit.
David Hasselhoff: Little man, my best friend is a talking car.
Becca: You smell like pine needles, and have a face like sunshine!
Jesse Richter: When I'm about to kiss you, you'll know it.
Gil: I'm having trouble because I'm a Hollywood hack who never gave real literature a shot.