Maurice 'Momo': We were here in the 80's to watch the Russians. I can't tell you the trouble we made.
Hubert Fiorentini: That's right you can't, now try to keep your mouth shut for 5 minutes.
Mayor Phlegmming: Good evening, citizens of Frank. In the past few weeks of the campaign, my opponent has thrown around a lot of fancy words to try to confuse the issues. Words like "exercise", "low-fat", and "diet." Words designed to scare us into changing what has worked for so many years. Well, I say, let's stay the course. Remember, a fat Frank is a happy Frank.
Leah: What? That's not what I wrote.
Mayor Phlegmming: I propose something that every organism in this city will enjoy. I give you a dream vacation to the annual chicken wing festival in Buffalo, New York. Final plans have been made and nothing is going to stand in our way!
Beryl Mason: I was with Freddie because I was in a blackout. What's your excuse?
Archie: Uh-oh! Uh-oh.
Dr. Dolittle: Uh-oh, what? What's the problem?
Archie: Ice cream is acting up.
Dr. Dolittle: What ice cream?
Archie: I got depressed after Sonny and Ava, and I went on a bender. And by the second gallon, I realised I'm in love with Ava and this ice cream called "Cherry Garcia."
Susan: Are you hungry?
Karel Vojtí?ek: Not really... Yes.
Susan: Not really - yes?
Karel Vojtí?ek: I mean yes. Sorry... My English isn't very well. I mean good.
Julius Ceasar: When Alexander the Great was ten years younger than I am today, he had conquered the entire civilized world.
Vercingetorix: At your age, he was dead.
Julius Ceasar: All the more reason to hurry.
Randy: There's the ten-thousand dollars... well, aren't you gonna count it?
Mr. Burmeister: Nah.
Randy: You trust me?
Mr. Burmeister: No, but I kill people.
Al: So did you tell her who's boss?
C.W.: Is she kidding, talking to me like that? It's 'cause she thinks she's smarter... you know, 'cause she graduated from Vassar and I went to driving school.
Kyoji Ida: Don't get your hopes up. She must be over 70 now.
Genya Tachibana: She'll never grow old.
Kelly: Are you crying?
Berke Landers: No, you're squeezing my puncture wound.
Spencer Olham: They're wrong about me, I've done nothing wrong, I'm a good man.
Melanie Ballard: Well, introduce us to your friends.
Desolation Williams: These are my compadres, Uno, Dos and Tres.
Melanie Ballard: Uno must be the nice one.
Uno: You got that right, butchy. I'm not as nice as Desolation. And I'll cut your fucking titties off.
Erika Kohut: Do you like me calling you darling?
Walter Klemmer: It's absolutely marvelous.
Erika Kohut: You must be patient. I'll give you all the names, we'll play all the games you want.
Walter Klemmer: You know you really stink? Sorry, you stink so much, no-one will ever come close to you. You'd be better leave town until you don't stink so bad. Rinse your mouth more often, not just when my cock makes you puke.
[Afer Max punches a hole in a wall.]
Max Prince: I wanna hit something else. Something big! Something expensive!
Milt Fields: There's a bank across the street, Max.
Brad: I think you should sound like, a normal person... from the heart! From... the... heart.
Ifty: From the heart.
Sam: This argh okay hello thank you for calling this is Saaaaaaaam.
Ifty: Wow.
Brad: I feel that was a very thouching moment right there.
Ifty: I, I, I, I felt that one.
Sam: High five.
All: High five.
Jezzie Flannigan: Dr. Cross, Agent Ben Devine. Agent Devine is security systems supervisor.
Ben Devine: Well, for now. We're going to be thrown to the wolves, as soon as they find Megan Rose dead in a ditch.
Alex Cross: Now what makes you so sure that's what's going to happen?
Ben Devine: Me getting fired or the girl in a ditch? Sorry. I'm having a pessimistic day.
Ted: We're all time's captives, hostages to eternity.
Bobby: Ben Jonson?
Ted: No, Boris Pasternak. He was a Russian of no account, I think.
Napoleon Bonaparte: I am Napoleon.
Nicole 'Pumpkin' Truchaut: No, you're not Napoleon! I hate Napoleon! He's filled France with widows and orphans! He took my husband! I won't let him take you.