Best western movie quotes of all time

Jim: Well, it got so that every piss-ant prairie punk who thought he could shoot a gun would ride into town to try out the Waco Kid. I must have killed more men than Cecil B. DeMille. It got pretty gritty. I started to hear the word "draw" in my sleep. Then one day, I was just walking down the street when I heard a voice behind me say, "Reach for it, mister!" I spun around... And there I was, face-to-face with a six-year old kid. Well, I just threw my guns down and walked away. Little bastard shot me in the ass. So I limped to the nearest saloon, crawled inside a whiskey bottle, and I've been there ever since.

Lone Watie: Get ready, little lady. Hell is coming to breakfast.

Doc Holliday: Oh. Johnny, I apologize; I forgot you were there. You may go now.

Ned Pepper: What's your intention? Do you think one on four is a dogfall?
Rooster Cogburn: I mean to kill you in one minute, Ned. Or see you hanged in Fort Smith at Judge Parker's convenience. Which'll it be?
Ned Pepper: I call that bold talk for a one-eyed fat man!
Rooster Cogburn: Fill your hands, you son of a bitch!

Anna: You're a good sheep farmer!
Albert: Oh my god, please! I suck at sheep. Louise was right, I can't keep track of them. There was a sheep in the whorehouse the last week.
Anna: Really?
Albert: Yeah. Wandered in there, and then when I went to pick it up, somehow it had made 20 dollars.

Butch: Man, I got vision and the rest of the world wears bifocals.

Jefe: I have put many beautiful pinatas in the storeroom, each of them filled with little suprises.
El Guapo: Many pinatas?
Jefe: Oh yes, many!
El Guapo: Would you say I have a plethora of pinatas?
Jefe: A what?
El Guapo: A *plethora*.
Jefe: Oh yes, you have a plethora.
El Guapo: Jefe, what is a plethora?
Jefe: Why, El Guapo?
El Guapo: Well, you told me I have a plethora. And I just would like to know if you know what a plethora is. I would not like to think that a person would tell someone he has a plethora, and then find out that that person has *no idea* what it means to have a plethora.
Jefe: Forgive me, El Guapo. I know that I, Jefe, do not have your superior intellect and education. But could it be that once again, you are angry at something else, and are looking to take it out on me?

Rooster Cogburn: You go for a man hard enough and fast enough, he don't have time to think about how many's with him; he thinks about himself, and how he might get clear of that wrath that's about to set down on him.

Man With No Name: The way I figure, there's really not too much future with a sawed-off runt like you.

Eli: In all these years I've been carrying it and reading it every day, I got so caught up in keeping it safe that I forgot to live by what I learned from it.

Doc: Marty, the idea that I could fall in love at first sight! It's romantic nonsense. There's no scientific rationale for it.
Marty: Come on, Doc. It's not science. You meet the right girl it just hits you. It's like lightning.
Doc: Marty, please don't say that.

Boone: I'm actually starting to miss my wife's cooking.
Stubby Bill: Shit, I'm actually startin' to miss your wife.

Charlie Prince: For a one-leg rancher... He's one tough son of a bitch.

Major Marquis Warren: Move a little strange, you're gonna get a bullet. Not a warning, not a question...a bullet.

Capt. James West: Never drum on a white lady's boobies at a big redneck dance. Got it.

Sheriff Cobb: We'll give you a fair trial... Followed by a first class hangin'.

Bill Munny: You better bury Ned right, and don't go cuttin' up... Nor otherwise harm no whores, or I'll come back and kill every one of you sons-a-bitches.

Randall Bragg: I told you you'd never hang me, Cole.
Virgil Cole: Never ain't here yet.

Forrest Bondurant: I'm a Bondurant. We don't lay down for nobody.

Ed Furillo: What if you don't encourage them, and they still come after you?
Mitch Robbins: It doesn't happen. See, women need a reason to have sex, men just need a place.
Bonnie Rayburn: Good night! I'm going to bed.
Mitch Robbins: Good night! Sleep tight.
Ed Furillo: That was flirting.
Mitch Robbins: No, that was... Politeness. That was "have a pleasant and restful evening."
Ed Furillo: No, that was "I like your ass. Can I wear it as a hat?"