Quotes from Kelsey Grammer movies and TV shows

All people starting with K

Below are some quotes involving Kelsey Grammer - click the title to view the complete list. If you think their finest moments are missing from the full list, please submit them.

Frasier: Niles, I would shave my head for you.
Niles: A gesture which becomes less significant with each passing year.

Add time

Kisses Sweeter Than Wine - S3-E5

[Martin sees Frasier has a lot of cuts on his face from shaving.]
Martin: I thought you were just going to slit your wrists. Looks like you went for death by a thousand cuts.
Frasier: I cut myself shaving because I was shaving without water. Why was there no water? Because I had to move your chair, which gouged the floor, which made me call for Joe, who found bad pipes, which called for Cecil, who ate the cat that killed the rat that LIVED IN THE HOUSE THAT FRASIER BUILT!

Add time

Frasier: Roger, at Cornell University they have an incredible piece of scientific equipment known as the Tunneling Electron Microscope. Now, this microscope is so powerful that by firing electrons you can actually see images of the atom, the infinitesimally minute building blocks of our universe. Roger, if I were using that microscope right now, I still wouldn't be able to locate my interest in your problem.

Add time

Sleeping with the Enemy - S3-E6

Daphne: Oh, come on now, Dr Crane. It's not like men have never used sex to get what they want.
Frasier: How can we possibly use sex to get what we want?! Sex IS what we want!

Add time

Frasier: And though washing one's hands twenty to thirty times a day would be considered obsessive/compulsive, please bear in mind that your husband is a coroner. Thank you for your call, Jeanine. Roz, whom do we have next?

Add time

Seat of Power - S2-E11

Frasier: You know the expression "Living well is the best revenge"?
Niles: Wonderful expression. I just don't know how true it is, you don't see it turning up in a lot of opera plots."Ludwig, maddened by the poisoning of his entire family, wreaked vengeance on Gunther in the third act by living well."

Add time

Frasier: So, how do the calls look today?
Roz: Well, we've got a couple of jilted lovers, a man who's afraid of his car, a manic depressive, and three people who feel their lives are going nowhere.
Frasier: Oh, I love a Monday.

Add time

Frasier: Hello, Rachel. I'm listening.
Rachel: Oh, thanks for taking my call, Dr. Crane. Um, I'm involved in sort of a strange love triangle.
Frasier: Oh goody, this is sweeps week!

Add time

Frasier: Cupid and his arrow have declared me an endangered species.

Add time

Roz: It's not like she worships the devil!
Frasier: She doesn't have to worship the devil! He worships her!

Add time

Roz in the Doghouse - S2-E12

Roz Doyle: Who is it?
Bulldog: It's Bulldog.
Roz Doyle: Shh, pretend we're not here.
Frasier: Roz, you just said "Who is it?"

Add time

The Candidate - S2-E7

Daphne: It makes me glad we don't have so many guns in England.
Frasier: You don't need guns, you have kidney pie.

Add time

Frasier: Niles, is there a light bulb over my head?
Niles: You have an idea?
Frasier: No, I'm asking if there's actually a light bulb over my head.

Add time

Daphne: We're not the awful people you think we are!
Frasier: No! The truth is we've been lying to you all night!

Add time

The Two Mrs. Cranes - S4-E1

[Frasier is unaware Daphne is pretending to be married to Niles.]
Frasier: You've met Mrs. Crane?
Clive: She sure lights up a room, doesn't she?
Frasier: Yes. Usually by leaving it.

Add time

Cubs Fan

The Great Louse Detective - S14-E6

Bart/Lisa: Aaaaah! Sideshow Bob!
Sideshow Bob: Please. We've known each other for so long. Call me Bob.
Bart/Lisa: Aaaaah! Bob!

Add time

Day of the Jackanapes - S12-E13

Sideshow Bob: Urgh. Rakes, my arch-enemy.
Bart: I thought I was your arch-enemy.
Sideshow Bob: I have a life outside of you, Bart.

Add time

Brother From Another Series - S8-E16

Sideshow Bob: You do know I had a...problem with trying to...kill people?
Cecil: [sarcastic] Goodness, I had no idea! For you see, I have been on Mars for the last decade, in a cave, with my eyes shut and my fingers in my ears.
Sideshow Bob: Touché, Cecil.

Add time

Cubs Fan

Hunter: Junior, I saved this company by getting out of babies and into package delivery. Monday, it'll all be yours, barring some monumental screw-up.

Add time

Hunter: We can't let it get out that we accidentally made a baby.

Add time

Share

Follow

Join the mailing list