Jim Rockford: Hey, I'm sorry Dad, you just caught me at a bad time. Reading that detective fiction doesn't help. I mean things aren't like that you know? They're not black and white. There aren't any heroes left, they die young [pointing to a book cover]. His gun is deadly? Mine's in a cookie jar.
John Bacchus: You're under arrest.
George Gently: He's under arrest, when I say he is.
Sloane: Marshall, would you please go back to work?
Agent Marshall Flinkman: Just to clarify, I'm not being fired?
Sloane: Back to work means not fired.
Sydney Fox: I'm talking about something much more serious than a curse! I'm talking about a crazy woman in a bustier.
Agent Devlin: Everybody's got a theory on the increasing violence in our society.
Agent Emmerich: My wife thinks it's the artificial hormones in beef.
Agent Devlin: What's your take?
Frank Black: I don't think it's the beef.
Number 6: Unlike me, many of you have accepted the situation of your imprisonment, and will die here like rotten cabbages.
Maddie: That's your trouble, David - you think hot sex cures everything.
David: Well, it is an effective treatment for localized high blood pressure in males.
Richie Ryan: Come on, do it. Come on, come on, go ahead, do it. When the Quickening knocks you on your skinny little ass, MacLeod's gonna be right there to help you up. I die, you go right behind me.
Dr. Paul Wayne: So what difference does it make, whether it's 20 minutes or 20 years, since neither amounts to the faintest echo of the tiniest whisper in the thunder of time.
Kessler: Who are you?
Remington Steele: Just a happy go lucky tourist out to see a bit of the world.
Neff: Is that why you've got five passports, from five different countries, in five different names?
Remington Steele: Kept trying for a good picture.
Yagami Light: I'll solve equations with my right hand and write names with my left. I'll take a potato chip... and eat it.
Shawn Spencer: Good morning detectives, collecting money for the Policeman's ball?
Carlton Lassiter: We don't have balls.
Shawn Spencer: I honestly have no response to that.
Olive Snook: Yesterday, a farrier named Lucas Shoemaker was found dead. Trampled.
Emerson Cod: Why should I care about a dude that sells fur coats?
Olive Snook: Not a furrier, a farrier. Heir.
Emerson Cod: Fair-rier?
Olive Snook: It's a blacksmith. Puts shoes on horses.
Emerson Cod: Don't try to act like that's a word everybody knows.
Phillip Broyles: Someone out there is experimenting, only the whole world is their lab.
Mac: Time has little to do with infinity and jelly donuts.
Hairdresser: Shouldn't I have a lawyer?
Brenda Leigh Johnson: You could call a lawyer... but if you do I'll tear this custody agreement into little pieces and Dean will walk away with your baby the minute it's born.
Sherlock Holmes: If you eliminate the impossible, whatever remains, however improbable, is the truth.
Alan Decker: It's okay. I'm used to the callous attitude mortals have towards vampires. I'm used to wandering the earth - reviled, hunted, hated. That's why I became a lawyer.
Jamie: Aren't tracer rounds illegal?