The Big Bang Theory

The Big Bang Theory (2007)

14 quotes from season 1

(13 votes)

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Pilot - S1-E1

Penny: Four years I lived with him! Four years, I mean that's like as long as high school!
Sheldon: It took you FOUR YEARS to get through high school?

Pilot - S1-E1

Penny: So, what do you guys do for fun around here?
Sheldon: Well, today we tried masturbating for money.

The Bat Jar Conjecture - S1-E13

Sheldon: At this point, I should inform you that I intend to form my own team and destroy the very bonds that bind your very matter together and reduce the resulting particulate chaos to tears!
Leonard: Thanks for the heads up.
Sheldon: You're welcome. [Turns to leave.] One more thing,
Leonard: Yes?
Sheldon: It's on, bitch.

The Dumpling Paradox - S1-E7

Sheldon: Every Saturday morning since we've lived in this apartment, I have awakened at 6:15, poured myself a bowl of cereal, added a quarter cup of 2% milk, sat on that end of that couch, turned on BBC America and watched Doctor Who.
Leonard: Penny's still sleeping.
[Sheldon stares at Penny for some time.]
Sheldon: Every Saturday since we've lived in this apartment.

Pilot - S1-E1

Sheldon: We are committing genetic fraud. There's no guarantee that our sperm is going to generate high IQ offspring, think about that. I have a sister with the same basic DNA mix who hostesses at Fuddruckers.

The Loobenfeld Decay - S1-E10

Sheldon: I was analyzing our lie and I believe we're in danger of Penny seeing through the ruse.
Leonard: How?
Sheldon: Simple: If she were to log on to SoCal physics group.org forward slash activities forward slash other, scroll down to seminars, download the PDF schedule, and look for the seminar on molecular positronium, well then, bippity boppity boo, our pants are metaphorically on fire!

Pilot - S1-E1

Leonard: We need to widen our circle.
Sheldon: I have a very wide circle. I have 212 friends on MySpace.
Leonard: Yes, and you've never met one of them.
Sheldon: That's the beauty of it.

The Loobenfeld Decay - S1-E10

Penny: Sheldon, have you any idea what time it is?
Sheldon Cooper: Of course I do. My watch is linked to the atomic clock in Boulder, Colorado. It's accurate to one-tenth of a second. But as I'm saying this, it occurs to me that you may have again been asking a rhetorical question.

The Dumpling Paradox - S1-E7

Penny: Anything else I should know?
Sheldon: Yes, If you use my toothbrush, I'll jump out that window. Please don't come to my funeral. Have a good night.

The Luminous Fish Effect - S1-E4

Sheldon: Pleased to meet you, Dr. Gablehauser. How fortunate is it that the university has chosen to hire you, despite the fact that you've done no original research in 25 years and instead have written a series of popular books that reduce the great concept of science to a series of anecdotes, each one dumbed down to accommodate the duration of the average bowel movement. Mahalo.

The Loobenfeld Decay - S1-E10

Leonard: I already lied. Why cover it up with another lie?
Sheldon Cooper: Because your lie was painfully transparent, whereas my lie is exquisitely convoluted. While you were sleeping, I was busy weaving an un-unravelable web.

The Pork Chop Indeterminacy - S1-E15

Character mistake: In his conversation with Missy Sheldon makes it clear that his superior intelligence is a result of a random, mutated gene. Since Missy isn't similarly intelligent she obviously isn't carrying this mutated gene (which would be a billion to one shot anyway) so her offspring wouldn't inherit it. Sheldon would know this - his offspring would carry the mutated gene for superior intelligence, Missy's would not. Anyone knowing enough about genetics to use the term 'randomly mutated gene' understands enough to know that the mutated gene would only be expressed in a direct line from the carrier - Sheldon. Also bear in mind he has a model of the DNA molecule in his living room - it is obviously an interest.

Upvote valid corrections to help move entries into the corrections section.

Suggested correction: Genes can be dormant. Which allows them to skip generations. Therefor Missy's children could actually get the "mutated" gene. This is especially true since Sheldon and Missy are twins. Also, since the episode is about who out of Leonard, Howard or Raj, Sheldon would allow to "mate" with his sister, there is the added "insurance" of getting any smart genes from any of the 3 Lothario's mentioned above.

If you are going to try to argue with a geneticist about genetics, please use the correct terms. Sheldon is not referring to a recessive gene - there is no such thing as a dormant gene - he is speaking of a randomly mutated gene. Those are the words he used. If he had inherited a homozygous recessive karotype - one recessive gene from each of his parents - then somewhere in his family tree there would similarly gifted people, in which case he would use the correct term - a recessive gene. If Missy is a heterozygotic dominant karotype possessing the recessive gene for super-genius and the dominant for ordinary intelligence then mating her with Howard, Raj or Leonard would be a waste of time as their dominant genius gene would prevent the recessive super-genius gene from being expressed in the phenotype of the resulting child. The child would be highly intelligent but not on Sheldon's standards. It doesn't matter if Sheldon does not know any of this as he refers several times to a randomly mutated gene, not a recessive one. Missy does not carry the super-genius gene. The posting is correct.

Sheldon is prone to magical thinking when necessary to preserve his obsessive need to control his environment. He may have simply ignored the flaw in his reasoning, as even the most intelligent humans do when venturing outside their ares of expertise. He may be interested in the science of genetics, but his Ph.D. in physics doesn't qualify him as an expert in that field.

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Question: How come Raj has no problem speaking to his mother, but, when around other women, such as Penny, he immediately stops talking? Also, why does he have to whisper in someone's ear if he wants to ask Penny something?

Answer: Because Raj's selective mutism seems to be caused by women that Raj sees (on some sort of conscious or subconscious level) as a potential sexual partner. An attribute that wouldn't apply to either his sister or mother.

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