Best comedy movie quotes of 2014

Please vote as you browse around to help the best rise to the top.

Movie Quote Quiz
A Million Ways to Die in the West picture

Anna: You're a good sheep farmer!
Albert: Oh my god, please! I suck at sheep. Louise was right, I can't keep track of them. There was a sheep in the whorehouse the last week.
Anna: Really?
Albert: Yeah. Wandered in there, and then when I went to pick it up, somehow it had made 20 dollars.

More A Million Ways to Die in the West quotes
Kingsman: The Secret Service picture

Harry Hart: There is nothing noble in being superior to your fellow man; true nobility is being superior to your former self.

More Kingsman: The Secret Service quotes
The Grand Budapest Hotel picture

M. Gustave: Well, what does it say? Where is it? What's it all about, damn it? Don't keep us in suspense, Serge, this has been a complete fucking nightmare! Just tell us what the fuck is going on!

More The Grand Budapest Hotel quotes
The Lego Movie picture

Vitruvius: The Special has arisen.
Gandalf: Have the young man step forward.
Vitruvius: As you wish, Dubbledore.
Gandalf: I'm Gandalf!
Dumbledore: It's pronounced Dumbledore.
Vitruvius: Dubbledore?
Dumbledore: No, Dumbledore.
Vitruvius: I thought you said Dubbledore.
Gandalf: Vetruvius!
Vitruvius: Ah, we gotta write all that down 'cause I'm not gonna remember any of it, but here we go. The Special will now give an eloquent speech.

More The Lego Movie quotes
Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles picture

Michelangelo: What's up, brah? Oh, you think you can handle this, Huh? I'm a snapping turtle fool!

More Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles quotes
Big Hero 6 picture

Fred: If I could have any superpower right now, it would be to be able to go through that phone and give you a big hug.

More Big Hero 6 quotes
Dumb and Dumber To picture

Harry Dunne: Whoa, Lloyd. Check out the hotties at 12 o'clock.
Lloyd Christmas: That's three hours away. Why can't I check 'em out now?

More Dumb and Dumber To quotes
Tammy picture

Tammy: That's not chicken. I don't know what it is, but it's not bird.
Keith Morgan: I can promise you that's 110% bird.
Tammy: Bird doesn't come out of a squeezy tube!

Quantom X Premium member
More Tammy quotes
The Inbetweeners 2 picture

Will McKenzie: Meanwhile, I was chasing a girl I had recently fingered to sleep.

More The Inbetweeners 2 quotes
The Other Woman picture

Lydia: Selfish people live longer.

More The Other Woman quotes
22 Jump Street picture

Jenko: I'm your best nightm... I'm your worst nightmare.

More 22 Jump Street quotes
That Awkward Moment picture

Preppy Guy: I need a drink too. I'll get you a drink too.
Ellie: Honestly what if I enjoy the drink. What happens then?
Preppy Guy: I'd love to hear what you think happens then.
Ellie: I'll tell you what happens then we go play beer pong with your two roommates until I end up back at yours in Murray hill.
Preppy Guy: Yeah, that's right how'd you know that.
Ellie: Yeah then I have to listen to your roommate have sex with Hilary, or Emily or whatever the girl's name is, until we fall asleep. And then a year later we're still playing beer pong in the same bars with your friends except now you feel pressured to get married and have kids because you think that's what I want.
Jason: Then in the summers you drive up to the Hampton to meet his parents wondering the whole ride if they're going to think your pretty enough.
Ellie: Smart.
Jason: Wondering the whole ride if they're going to think you're smart enough.
Ellie: Because no one is and then we have to drink shitty chardonnay.
Jason: At a shitty garden party.
Ellie: And have shitty conversations.
Jason: About shitty people.
Ellie: With his shitty mother.
Jason: Who let's face it doesn't think you're smart enough.
Ellie: Pretty.
Jason: Let's face it, doesn't think you're pretty enough.
Ellie: Because no one is.
Jason: No one ever will be.
Preppy Guy: What's all that shit, I'm just talking about a drink.
Jason: Yeah, but it wasn't just a drink though, was it.
Ellie: It was a marriage proposal.
Preppy Guy: Woah marriage, nah. It was a vodka soda. Alright fuck you guys then [walks off].
Jason: Drink?
Ellie: Yep.

More That Awkward Moment quotes
Muppets Most Wanted picture

[Dominic puts his business card in front of the muppets.]
Kermit: Dominic Badguy?
Dominic: It's pronounced Bajee. It's French. It means "Decent Man."

More Muppets Most Wanted quotes
Into the Woods picture

Cinderella's Prince: I was raised to be charming, not sincere.

More Into the Woods quotes
Rio 2 picture

Jewel: We are not people, we're birds. We have to get out into the wild and be birds, Blu.

More Rio 2 quotes
Calvary picture

Father James Lavelle: I've always felt there's something inherently psychopathic about joining the army in peace time, as far as I'm concerned people join the army to find out what its like to kill someone. I hardly think that's an inclination that should be encouraged in modern society, do you?

More Calvary quotes
Neighbors picture

Mac Radner: I'll call my mother she'll know what to do.
Kelly Radner: Do not call your mother! Jesus, you Jews and your fucking mothers.

More Neighbors quotes
Frank picture

Jon Burroughs: Wow, this is beautiful. What do you call it?
Clara: Stay away from my fucking theremin.

More Frank quotes
Walk of Shame picture

Kyle: Are you in a crack house?
Meghan: Yes! That's what I've been trying to tell you.

More Walk of Shame quotes
Magic in the Moonlight picture

Stanley: All my optimism was an illusion.

More Magic in the Moonlight quotes

Join the mailing list

Separate from membership, this is to get updates about mistakes in recent releases. Addresses are not passed on to any third party, and are used solely for direct communication from this site. You can unsubscribe at any time.