Best comedy movie quotes of 2014

Anna: You're a good sheep farmer!
Albert: Oh my god, please! I suck at sheep. Louise was right, I can't keep track of them. There was a sheep in the whorehouse the last week.
Anna: Really?
Albert: Yeah. Wandered in there, and then when I went to pick it up, somehow it had made 20 dollars.

Harry Hart: There is nothing noble in being superior to your fellow man; true nobility is being superior to your former self.

M. Gustave: Well, what does it say? Where is it? What's it all about, damn it? Don't keep us in suspense, Serge, this has been a complete fucking nightmare! Just tell us what the fuck is going on!

Vitruvius: The Special has arisen.
Gandalf: Have the young man step forward.
Vitruvius: As you wish, Dubbledore.
Gandalf: I'm Gandalf!
Dumbledore: It's pronounced Dumbledore.
Vitruvius: Dubbledore?
Dumbledore: No, Dumbledore.
Vitruvius: I thought you said Dubbledore.
Gandalf: Vetruvius!
Vitruvius: Ah, we gotta write all that down 'cause I'm not gonna remember any of it, but here we go. The Special will now give an eloquent speech.

Michelangelo: What's up, brah? Oh, you think you can handle this, Huh? I'm a snapping turtle fool!

Baymax: On a scale of 1 to 10, how would you rate your pain?

Harry Dunne: Whoa, Lloyd. Check out the hotties at 12 o'clock.
Lloyd Christmas: That's three hours away. Why can't I check 'em out now?

Tammy: That's not chicken. I don't know what it is, but it's not bird.
Keith Morgan: I can promise you that's 110% bird.
Tammy: Bird doesn't come out of a squeezy tube!

Quantom X

Preppy Guy: I need a drink too. I'll get you a drink too.
Ellie: Honestly what if I enjoy the drink. What happens then?
Preppy Guy: I'd love to hear what you think happens then.
Ellie: I'll tell you what happens then we go play beer pong with your two roommates until I end up back at yours in Murray hill.
Preppy Guy: Yeah, that's right how'd you know that.
Ellie: Yeah then I have to listen to your roommate have sex with Hilary, or Emily or whatever the girl's name is, until we fall asleep. And then a year later we're still playing beer pong in the same bars with your friends except now you feel pressured to get married and have kids because you think that's what I want.
Jason: Then in the summers you drive up to the Hampton to meet his parents wondering the whole ride if they're going to think your pretty enough.
Ellie: Smart.
Jason: Wondering the whole ride if they're going to think you're smart enough.
Ellie: Because no one is and then we have to drink shitty chardonnay.
Jason: At a shitty garden party.
Ellie: And have shitty conversations.
Jason: About shitty people.
Ellie: With his shitty mother.
Jason: Who let's face it doesn't think you're smart enough.
Ellie: Pretty.
Jason: Let's face it, doesn't think you're pretty enough.
Ellie: Because no one is.
Jason: No one ever will be.
Preppy Guy: What's all that shit, I'm just talking about a drink.
Jason: Yeah, but it wasn't just a drink though, was it.
Ellie: It was a marriage proposal.
Preppy Guy: Woah marriage, nah. It was a vodka soda. Alright fuck you guys then [walks off].
Jason: Drink?
Ellie: Yep.

[Dominic puts his business card in front of the muppets.]
Kermit: Dominic Badguy?
Dominic: It's pronounced Bajee. It's French. It means "Decent Man."

Will McKenzie: Meanwhile, I was chasing a girl I had recently fingered to sleep.

Lydia: Selfish people live longer.

Jenko: I'm your best nightm... I'm your worst nightmare.

Cinderella's Prince: I was raised to be charming, not sincere.

Rose Hathaway: I should probably point out that my best friend, Lissa Dragomir, is a royal member of an ancient race. And, yeah, like most creatures with fangs, they live off blood. My name is Rose Hathaway and I've been sworn to protect the royal blood line with my life.

Agamemnon: What sort of creature are you?
Ms. Grunion: The name's Grunion.
Agamemnon: I'm in love.

Drew: Women like that use guys like you to get advise about guys like me.

JJ: You see... Jess needs to feel important... Maureen, she needs to feel... loved. And you, you just need to grow a brain. See... you can solve your problems. But me... I can't.

Frank: Lips pursed together as if to say "Enough frivolity" - today, we begin work on the album in earnest.

Oren Little: And when you sing "Cry Me a River," it doesn't have to be the whole river.