Quotes from Jason Alexander movies and TV shows - page 2 of 2

The Handicap Spot - S4-E22

[Jerry and Elaine found out that the TV that they gave to Drake and his girlfriend was given to his girlfriend after they broke up.]
Jerry: We're not getting that TV back.
George: What do you mean? I mean you gave it to them, we get it back.
Elaine: The Drakette took it.
George: She can't take it. It's not hers, it's theirs. Once there's no theirs, there's no hers. It should be ours.

bobthedancingdonut
More Seinfeld quotes

Mauricio: Shallow Hal wants a gal.

Rosemary: Is that a Member's Only jacket?
Mauricio: Yes.
Rosemary: So what are you, the last member?

Hal: Hey, if you can see something and hear it and smell it, what keeps it from being real?
Mauricio: Third Party Perspective.

Mauricio: Hey Hal, come look at this turd! It looks like Klinger from M.A.S.H..

Mauricio: She's got cankles.

Hal: And Vicki?
Mauricio: Who?
Hal: Vicki.
Mauricio: Who's Vicki?
Hal: Vicki. Vicki, with the short brown hair.
Mauricio: Vicki? I thought that was a guy! I was calling her Vic.

Mauricio: You can't come back with a comeback after eight seconds. You got three seconds. Five, tops. It's called a quip, not a sloooowwwwp.

Mauricio: You Had Me At "Get Lost."

More Shallow Hal quotes

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