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Virginia Mason: Santa?
Santa Claus: Yes Virginia, there is a Santa Claus.

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[Jenny throws a bucket of water on Priscilla.]
Priscilla: I'm melting! I'm melting! Ha, Ha. It didn't work, did it Dorothy? This is reality, not MGM.

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Matt: I just haven't been with that many girls.
Vivian: I'm a real good teacher.

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Evelyn: You broke my heart.
Max: I know, but it's not beating anymore.

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Terrible Tommy: "Come on runt."
Rosa Carlo: "Stop calling me that."

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Susan: What do you want, Harold?
Harold: What I've always wanted Susan, your heart.

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