Best TV quotes of 2001
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David Brent: I don't look upon this like it's the end, I look upon it like it's moving on, you know. It's almost like my work here's done. I can't imagine Jesus going 'Oh, I've told a few people in Bethlehem I'm the son of God, can I just stay here with Mum and Dad now?' No. You gotta move on. You gotta spread the word. You gotta go to Nazareth, please. And that's, very much like... Me. My world does not end within these four walls, Slough's a big place. And when I've finished with Slough, there's Reading, Aldershot, Bracknell, you know I've got to... Didcott, Yately. You know. My... Winersh, Taplow. Because I am my own boss, I can... Burfield. I can wake up one morning and go 'Ooh, I don't feel like working today, can I just stay in bed?' 'Ooh, don't know, better ask the boss.' 'David can I stay in bed all day?' 'Yes you can David.' Both me, that's not me in bed with another bloke called David.
2nd Lt. Thomas Peacock: Holy shit.
SSgt. Floyd 'Tab' Talbert: It's a whole other company.
Sgt. Martin: No shit.
Aku: Long ago in a distant land, I, Aku, the shape shifting master of darkness, unleashed an unspeakable evil. But a foolish samurai warrior wielding a magic sword stepped forth to oppose me. Before the final blow was struck, I tore open a portal in time, and flung him into the future where my evil is law. Now the fool seeks to return to the past and undo the future that is Aku.
Hoss Delgado: Give it to us straight, Goodburger. Is our little Remus.
Hoss Delgado: ...Billy, on the bullet train to Smartsville, or is he riding the slow pony to the rubber forest?
Brian Potter: Don't talk to me about upper body strength, Lesley! My forearms are massive.
Les: An' we all know why that is don't we? Too much "Trumpet Polishin'"
Jonny: My daughter will want for nothing. She'll have dollies-a-plenty. And bears but no clowns, they scare me. And on a perfect summer's eve, when the sun dances like... Michael Flatley... after our dinner of spaghetti hoops, we shall run like Billy-ho himself, down to a sea so calm it would make Des Lynam look like a big, scary wolfman. She will be the most cherished little girl in the whole world. My little Ferrari.
Janet: Jonny, I'm not pregnant.
Jonny: Oh thank fuck for that.
Helga: Don't shoot or I'll kiss him again.
Milo Oblong: She's not bluffing! She'll do it! Her lips are like shark skin.