Beckett: Exactly how many times have you been married, Castle?
Beckett: That's it?
Castle: Isn't that enough? How 'bout you?
Beckett: Me? No. Never been.
Castle: You'd be good at it, you're both controlling and disapproving. You should really try it.
Beckett: I'm not an "if at first you don't succeed" kind of a girl, Castle, when it comes to marriage, I'm more of a "one and done" type.
Castle: Hmm, any serious candidates?
Gina: What kind of idiot kills off his best-selling main character?
Castle: Are you asking as my blood-sucking publisher or as my blood-sucking ex-wife?
Gina: Oh, is that what you're doing? Punishing me by killing the golden goose?
Castle: Oh, come on. I may be petty and short-sighted, but I'm not that petty and short-sighted.
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Castle: OK, maybe this might cheer you up a little bit. [Reaches in his back pocket and pulls out a wad of money.] Your winnings.
Beckett: My winnings?
Castle: Oh, don't play coy with me, you threw your hand!
Beckett: Alright, I was trying to be nice... I didn't want to embarrass you in front of your friends.
Castle: Now we're even. So what do you say to ah, a little showdown? Head to head. Toe to toe. Winner take all. Mano y mujer.
Beckett: Hand to woman?
Castle: Whatever it takes.
Beckett: You're on!
Castle: No mercy!
Beckett: I'm gonna make you hurt!
Castle: Oh, you're going to get hurt!
Beckett: What are we playing for?
Castle: Pride, or clothing.
Beckett: I think I've got a bag of Gummy Bears.
Beckett: [In the elevator handing Castle a wad of money.]
Castle: What's this?
Beckett: Your winnings from the other night. I'm not an idiot, I knew you threw the last hand.
Castle: How did you figure it out?
Beckett: That's not the point.
Castle: Ooh, my mother called you, didn't she?!
Beckett: You owe me a rematch!
Castle: Fine. You wanna play, let's play! How 'bout tomorrow night?
Beckett: With your 'mystery buddies'?
Castle: What, are you kidding? No, no, no, those guys would eat you alive! No, I was thinking something a little more local...my, ah, 'Gotham City Crew', guys I beat on a regular basis.
Beckett: Your 'Gotham City Crew'?
Castle: Yeah, Captain, the Mayor and Judge Markway. You know, your boss, your boss' boss, and the guy that signs your warrants, or would that make you nervous? I mean, I wouldn't want to throw your game, but I also don't want you to feel patronized.
Beckett: Jut set it up, and prepare to get your ass kicked.
Beckett: Don't you have a book coming out today, or something?
Castle: Yeah, so?
Beckett: So, you are watching me do paperwork, it's creepy! Did you have somewhere else to be?
Castle: I like it here.
Beckett: Oh my gosh, I get it. You're hiding. Your book is coming out today, and you're hiding!
Castle: No, hiding would be building a fortress out of my comforter and then downing a fifth of scotch, but apparently that's considered unhealthy.
Beckett: I thought that you don't care what people think?
Castle: I don't...much.
Lawyer: Mr. Castle, be advised, if you get injured following Detective Beckett to research your next novel, you cannot sue the city. If you get shot, you cannot sue the city. If you get killed...
Castle: My lifeless remains cannot sue the city?
Lawyer: Your heirs, Mr. Castle.
Beckett: Do I have to wait for him to sign, or can I shoot him now? [Then mouthing, "No? OK."]
Lawyer: Mr. Castle, these waivers are serious business, perhaps you'd feel more comfortable by referring the matter to your attorney?
Castle: What, are you kidding? He'd never let me sign these! But fortunately it's his job to get me out of trouble, and not to prevent me from getting into it.
Castle: Alright, so you and I are married.
Beckett: We are not married!
Castle: Relax, it's just pretend.
Beckett: I don't want to pretend!
Castle: Scared you'll like it?
Beckett: OK, if we're married, I want a divorce!
Roger: Are you two like this all the time?
Castle and Beckett: [Together] Yes!