Donald Kaufman: A little push, push in the bush.
Pero: Please, your honor I'm here to confess. That man is innocent. Your honor I can no longer live with the guilt. It was me who was stealing that car, I confess. My brother Cosimo, Saint Cosimo as he's known on the streets, was only trying to stop me. And I told him, 'Cosimo, I need to steal this car, I'm a car thief, I steal cars... by myself.'.
Marco Zuluaga: Love is the saddest thing when it goes away, as a song by Jobim goes.
Ben Carpenter: Megalo-who?
Milan: One guy can't take two on, except in the movies.
Gerald: Do these belts come in any other color?
Bridget: Black or pink?
Gerald: Uh, we'll take black.
Mr. Burke: Shaun! I read your story. You used a lot of big words. Great! Good for you! It was a little long, so I didn't read the whole thing, but who cares 'cause I gave you an A.
Eddie: This is football we're talking about here, which you call bananas and you're reluctant to play it. But you play baseball, the World Series. You've won every year, America's won every year in that. Well done America.
Trailer Trash Thumb: A lot of kids were disappearing in the woods, all mysterious like. And people thought it might be... David Copperfield. In a stage show, he took a llama and put it in a box. He closed the box and spinned it around. He opened up the box. There's no llama! And you don't see that every day, there's a llama here, llama gone. Llama, no llama. Just chills you to the bones.
Carla: First lesson: Zip it and listen.
Kelly Collins: Two things I have never mastered.
Nadine: I read somewhere once that everything in life happens in threes. And that there are two kinds of people, the ones that think three's the charm and the ones that think in three strikes you're out.
Dave: Your mama's got no teeth and that's perfect for her line of work.
Catherine: Oh, eww, this arugal is so bitter! It'l like my algebra teacher on my bread.
Tony Wilson: Energy, energy? Energy is, is, it's nothing more than a lot of new age hokum masquerading as spirituality.
Alan A. Allen: I am an inventor, Patrick. An inventor of machines.
Val: I came to hold out an olive branch.
Tony Waxman: "An olive branch"? What is this, the Israeli parliament?
Bagel Guy: Yeah. Fire in the hole.
Randolph Grady: You know, I could help you study.
Starla Grady: Yeah and what's the catch?
Randolph Grady: No catch, you just gotta be nice to me for the rest of my life.
Starla Grady: Ha! I should have known you'd exploit this for emotional blackmail. That's just mean you... user.