Jordan: Hey Woods, whats it like kissing your sister?
Reporter: The way I see it you and I are on the same team here. The only difference is you're looking for a cause of death and I'm looking for a by-line.
Jordan: You keep following me you'll be looking for a hospital.
Dr. Nigel Townsend: Jordan, you should know that last night will never happen again.
Jordan: Oh God, what are we talking about here?
Dr. Nigel Townsend: My new image in the workplace. No more Nigel-the-computer-jockey. Okay, I was swept up in the moment, but now it's truly done.
Jordan: Look... You guys get along. I need you to talk to him.
Woody: He pulled a gun on me.
Jordan: That's bonding for him. He feels comfortable with you.
Woody: He said he was going to shoot me.
Jordan: You see... You guys are closer than I thought.
Jordan: He's lucky I didn't kick him in the nuts. What? It wouldn't be the first time.
Woody: Any way to tell her age from the autopsy?
Bug: Sure, I'll just cut her open and count the rings.
Woody: You could have simply said no.
Jordan: Is this the part where I'm supposed to apologize too?
Garrett: Didn't want to ask the impossible.
Macy: Get your coat.
Dr. Peter Winslow: But it's pouring.
Macy: We're like the post office. Neither rain, nor sleet.
Dr. Nigel Townsend: The bullet then continues up the arm to break the humerus, not very funny in this case.
Nigel: I'm so glad you decided to go undercover Woody. You're blending right in.
Woody: Sorry, I didn't get the memo. Did you sew those pants on yourself?
Woody: The nun had a baby? How could that be?
Jordan: She's a woman first, nun second.
Jordan: Traffic control command center has cameras all over the city, right?
Detective Carver: Most of the sections, yeah.
Jordan: I know 'cause I keep getting sent pictures of myself running red lights.
Det. Winslow: You looked good holding that baby, maybe you should think about popping one out.
Jordan: Yeah, or maybe I should pop my foot up your ass.
Macy: Dead men do tell tales, I guess.
Woody: What do we got?
Garrett: Well, since they called for a medical examiner and homicide detective, my guess is a body.
Woody: Is sarcasm a prerequisite for being an ME?
Garrett: It helps.
Jordan: I had this guy's brain in my hand, so I couldn't very well punch him, right?
Mr. Hummer: He will be preserved until his condition is reversible.
Dr. Nigel Townsend: His condition is dead.
Mr. Hummer: Man, you people are like a broken record.
Macy: I really don't like you.
DA Rene Walcott: Right back at you.
Macy: I mean not at all.
DA Rene Walcott: I get it. Just kiss me.
Dr. Nigel Townsend: I paid seven homeless people to go dumpster diving for me.
Macy: Who's money did you use?
Dr. Nigel Townsend: Yours.
Bug: I pulled tissue samples from John Doe and cross-referenced his biological data with local insect activity and came up with a time of death.
Jordan: That's my Bug.
Bug: Eleven days, four hours.
Detective Matt Seely: Four hours?
Bug: Well... Give or take.
