Roger Murtaugh: I knew you couldn't stop smoking. Martin Riggs: I'm only smoking to take my mind off my dog biscuit problem. Roger Murtaugh: What dog biscuit problem? Martin Riggs: Well I've been chasing more cars lately and y'know, when I try and lick my balls I keep falling off the couch.
Lorna Cole: Police, freeze! Hatchett: Oh Christ, another one? We need a new fucking dog.
Martin Riggs: You have the right to remain unconscious. Anything you say ain't gonna be much.
Roger Murtaugh: I hope that when I do retire your new partner is just like you. Martin Riggs: That won't happen to me because there are winners and there are losers, and God wouldn't do that to me.
Riggs: We can't shoot a dog. People? Okay, but not dogs.
Roger Murtaugh: I got 8 days to my retirement, and I will NOT make a stupid mistake! Martin Riggs: Look, there is no bomb in that building! I will bet vital parts of my anatomy to the fact! Trust me, okay? Trust me! Roger Murtaugh: That's usually my first mistake!
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