Deputy Fallon: Bring me my legs.
Kenneth: Listen to me. You come to that launch site at 5:00... you take my hand, and I'll show you who can't time travel.
Dennis Dupree: This place is about to become a sea of sweat, ear-shattering music and puke.
Michelangelo: He sings for pleasure, not money.
Jerry: Well, there's a great deal of pleasure in money. You know, you... it's green and crinkly. You can fondle the bills.
Joyce Brewster: You want me to go to one of Gayle's miserable singles event? That's what you want? You want me whoring myself out? Put on a thong?
Andrew Brewster: I'm going to sleep now, Ma.
Lionel: Where's my record player?
James Washington: Remember me? The moon spook you turned into a snowflake?
Cam Brady: My heart is pounding. Like a phone book in a dryer.
Greg Heffley: I can't believe it's so crowded here. Maybe we should come back.
Rodrick Heffley: How about never? Does never sound good?
Joe: You know what this is like? Really just like high school, but instead of French homework, it's my dick.
Katie: Well, that's not true, because French was actually hard.
Mr. Rzykruski: Back home, everyone is scientist. Even my plumber wins Nobel Prize. Your country does not make enough scientist. Always needs more. You should be a scientist, Victor.
Aubrey Miller: So this girl Jane, she doesn't like you back?
Dave Hodgman: She does... platonically. As a friend.
Aubrey Miller: Oh, I know what platonically means. I'm a junior, not a moron.