Best comedy movie quotes of 1981

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Movie Quote Quiz
An American Werewolf in London picture

Alex: David, please be rational. Let's go and see Dr. Hirsch.
David: Yeah, be rational. Sure. I'm a fucking werewolf, for Christ's sake.

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Stripes picture

John Winger: C'mon, it's Czechoslovakia. We zip in, we pick 'em up, we zip right out again. We're not going to Moscow. It's Czechoslovakia. It's like going into Wisconsin.
Russell Ziskey: Well I got the shit kicked out of me in Wisconsin once. Forget it!

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Time Bandits picture

Randall: People who are always right make me sick.
Fidgit: That's why you get along with yourself so well.

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Arthur picture

Susan: Arthur, a real woman could stop you outside from drinking...
Arthur: Yeah, but she'd have to be a real BIG woman!

Lee Donovan

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The Cannonball Run picture

Batman: Mad Dog, you are going to take the shortcut to the interstate, right?
Mad Dog: We're in this to win, ain't we? If you're gonna be a bear, be a grizzly!

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Gregory's Girl picture

Headmaster: One problem area, the showers. What'll happen with the showers?
Phil Menzies: Oh, she'll bring her own soap.

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Shock Treatment picture

Janet Majors: I need some young blood, I need some young blood. I need it now.

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The Great Muppet Caper picture

Dorcas: What would you buy if you were bored?
Neville: Uh... a jar of calf's foot jelly.

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History of the World: Part I picture

Empress Nympho: Bob?
Bob: Yes, Your Highness?
Empress Nympho: Oh, Bob, do I have any openings that this man might fit?
Crowd: Whooooaaaaaaa.
Bob: Well, we could use another wine steward.
Josephus: I got a great corkscrew.
Crowd: Whoooaaaaaaa.
Josephus: Damn, this a hip crowd.

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It's Magic, Charlie Brown picture

Lucy van Pelt: Linus, have you seen Charlie Brown?
Linus van Pelt: Nobody has seen him since Snoopy's magic show. I just talked to Sally, and she said even when you look at him, you don't see him.
Lucy van Pelt: What's that supposed to mean? That's the dumbest thing I ever heard.

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Modern Problems picture

Darcy: Max, please, what is the matter with you lately? I was kidding.
Max Fielder: Look at my face. I can't go to dinner like this. Look.
Darcy: Your face looks fine.
Max Fielder: I'm not going. I'm staying up here.
Darcy: Max. Max, you promised me that you would try to relax and be close to me this weekend.
Max Fielder: You were only kidding?

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Condorman picture

Krokov: Have you seen this report on this Condorman? On this man Wilkins? He is an amateur, do you hear? He is not an agent of the CIA! He is a writer of comic books.

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S.O.B. picture

Tim Culley: What'd you give him?
Dr. Irving Finegarten: Oh, a pinch of this, a dash of that. Sometimes referred to in the trade as a Sleeping Beauty Boilermaker. Take no notice if he begins to levitate. It's a common side effect.

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Saturday the 14th picture

Yolanda: Oh, look. Isn't that that boy Bavarian from Budapest?
Waldemar: No, that's a fruit bat from the Philippines.

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Looney, Looney, Looney Bugs Bunny Movie picture

Yosemite Sam: Where am I? It sure is powerful warm in here. Is this Dallas?
Satan: No, but you're close.

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Zombie Lake picture

Morane: Let's get away from this heap of hicks.

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