Best comedy movie quotes of 1981

Please vote as you browse around to help the best rise to the top.

Movie Quote Quiz
Arthur picture

Susan: Arthur, a real woman could stop you outside from drinking...
Arthur: Yeah, but she'd have to be a real BIG woman!

Lee Donovan
More Arthur quotes
The Cannonball Run picture

Batman: Mad Dog, you are going to take the shortcut to the interstate, right?
Mad Dog: We're in this to win, ain't we? If you're gonna be a bear, be a grizzly!

More The Cannonball Run quotes
Student Bodies picture

The Breather: [On the phone.] I'm gonna kill next at the football game. Click.
Ms. Van Dyke: Did you hang up?
The Breather: No, I just said "click."

swordfish
More Student Bodies quotes
Stripes picture

John Winger: C'mon, it's Czechoslovakia. We zip in, we pick 'em up, we zip right out again. We're not going to Moscow. It's Czechoslovakia. It's like going into Wisconsin.
Russell Ziskey: Well I got the shit kicked out of me in Wisconsin once. Forget it!

More Stripes quotes
An American Werewolf in London picture

Alex: David, please be rational. Let's go and see Dr. Hirsch.
David: Yeah, be rational. Sure. I'm a fucking werewolf, for Christ's sake.

More An American Werewolf in London quotes
Time Bandits picture

Supreme Being: Oh, I do hate appearing that way, it's an entirely noisy manifestation. Still, rather expected of one, I suppose.

More Time Bandits quotes
Caveman picture

Atouk: Zug-zug.

More Caveman quotes
The Great Muppet Caper picture

Fozzie: Uh, excuse me, Mr. Holiday, sir. Would you let Kermit go? If you hold him too long, he'll just give you warts.

More The Great Muppet Caper quotes
Zorro, the Gay Blade picture

Charlotte Taylor Wilson: How can there be two of you?
Zorro: You always say, when the revolution came, there would be more for everyone.

More Zorro, the Gay Blade quotes
History of the World: Part I picture

Jaques: Josephus! How did you get here from the Roman Empire?
Josephus: Don't be square, mon cher! Movies is magic.

More History of the World: Part I quotes
Neighbors picture

Pa Greavy: Well, I hear you got a whore in there.
Earl Keese: Who told you that?
Pa Greavy: That's what I heard.
Earl Keese: Well, you heard wrong.
Pa Greavy: You ain't got a whore in there?
Earl Keese: No.
Pa Greavy: Wouldn't know where I could find one?
Earl Keese: Of course not.
Pa Greavy: One shows up, let me know?

More Neighbors quotes
Shock Treatment picture

Brad Majors: To Farley: I'm as sane as you are! Saner.
Cosmo: To Audience: And he was only with us for one day.

More Shock Treatment quotes
Gregory's Girl picture

Headmaster: One problem area, the showers. What'll happen with the showers?
Phil Menzies: Oh, she'll bring her own soap.

More Gregory's Girl quotes
Polyester picture

Francine Fishpaw: Dexter's been expelled from school.
Cuddles Kovinsky: For what?
Francine Fishpaw: For truancy.
Cuddles Kovinsky: It's just those common Baltimore public schools. God, I wish I lived in Connecticut.

More Polyester quotes
Condorman picture

Krokov: Have you seen this report on this Condorman? On this man Wilkins? He is an amateur, do you hear? He is not an agent of the CIA! He is a writer of comic books.

More Condorman quotes
S.O.B. picture

Tim Culley: What'd you give him?
Dr. Irving Finegarten: Oh, a pinch of this, a dash of that. Sometimes referred to in the trade as a Sleeping Beauty Boilermaker. Take no notice if he begins to levitate. It's a common side effect.

More S.O.B. quotes
It's Magic, Charlie Brown picture

Lucy van Pelt: Linus, have you seen Charlie Brown?
Linus van Pelt: Nobody has seen him since Snoopy's magic show. I just talked to Sally, and she said even when you look at him, you don't see him.
Lucy van Pelt: What's that supposed to mean? That's the dumbest thing I ever heard.

More It's Magic, Charlie Brown quotes
Modern Problems picture

Darcy: Max, please, what is the matter with you lately? I was kidding.
Max Fielder: Look at my face. I can't go to dinner like this. Look.
Darcy: Your face looks fine.
Max Fielder: I'm not going. I'm staying up here.
Darcy: Max. Max, you promised me that you would try to relax and be close to me this weekend.
Max Fielder: You were only kidding?

More Modern Problems quotes
Looney, Looney, Looney Bugs Bunny Movie picture

Yosemite Sam: Where am I? It sure is powerful warm in here. Is this Dallas?
Satan: No, but you're close.

More Looney, Looney, Looney Bugs Bunny Movie quotes
Zombie Lake picture

Morane: Let's get away from this heap of hicks.

More Zombie Lake quotes

Join the mailing list

Addresses are not passed on to any third party, and are used solely for direct communication from this site. You can unsubscribe at any time.