Best comedy movie quotes of 1977

Cledus Snow: You can't drive a fork lift.
Bandit: I can drive any forkin' thing around.

Jerry Landers: How can you permit all the *suffering* that goes on in the world?
God: Ah, how can *I* permit the suffering?
Jerry Landers: Yeah!
God: I don't permit the suffering. You do! Free will. All the choices are yours.
Jerry Landers: Choices? What choices?
God: You can love each other, cherish and nurture each other or you can kill each other. Incidentally, "kill" is the word. It's not "waste." If I meant "waste" I would have written "thou shalt not waste." You're doing some very funny things with words, here. You're also turning the sky into mud. I look down, I can't believe the filth. Using the rivers for toilets, poisoning my fishes. You want a miracle? *You* make a fish from scratch. You can't. You think only God can make a tree? Try coming up with a mackerel. And when the last one is gone, that'll be that. Eighty-six on the fishes, goodbye sky, so long world, over and out.

Paula McFadden: I thought you said you were decent.
Elliot Garfield: I am decent. I also happen to be naked.

Dr. Richard H. Thorndyke: You want to x-ray the celery? What do you think we're smuggling dope in the celery? The celery's not for dope. It's for dip.

Tim McCracken: They don't call me Dr. Hook for nothin'.
Jeff Hanson: How ya doin'?

Alvy Singer: I remember the staff at our public school. You know, we had a saying, uh, that those who can't do teach, and those who can't teach, teach gym. And, uh, those who couldn't do anything, I think, were assigned to our school.

Narrator: Never before has the beauty of the sexual act been so crassly exploited.

King Bruno the Questionable: Guards... kill that man.

Tanner Boyle: Jews, Spics, Niggers and a Wop that throws airballs.

Jane Harper: What kind of lunatic spends $1000 on lunch when he's out of a job and deeply in debt?
Dick Harper: The kind that knows you can't get a job if you look like a loser.
Jane Harper: If I was Diners Club, I'd your stomach bronzed and put it in the Hall of Fame.