Charlie Wilson: By the way, I love Jesus Christ and his mother Mary as much as anybody. About 38 churches you could move that creche to, everybody lives.
Joanne Herring: Go fight this war, Charlie. Everything possible is on the line - including your manhood.
Joanne Herring: I mean, how did you get into the CIA?
Gust Avrakotos: I don't work for the CIA, I work for the Department of Agriculture.
Joanne Herring: Fruit and Plant Division?
Gust Avrakotos: More specifically, apple imports.
Gust Avrakotos: Excuse me, what the fuck?
Charlie Wilson: I cannot just call up a judge and tell him what to do.
Larry Liddle: Why?
Charlie Wilson: Well cause it's against... a shitload of really good laws Garry.
Charlie Wilson: What's the gift for?
Gust Avrakotos: It's from the Afghan desk for doubling the budget for the Mujahadeen.
Charlie Wilson: Well, thank you.
Gust Avrakotos: It was nothing.
Charlie Wilson: It's a nice bottle of scotch. Must have been hard to get.
Gust Avrakotos: No, doubling the budget was nothing. Ten million dollars for covert ops against the Russian army is meaningless. What are you, an infant?
Zvi: You want me to steer Israel towards an arms deal with Egypt, Pakistan, and Saudi Arabia?
Charlie Wilson: Yes.
Zvi: Well, just one or two problems with that, just off the top of my head.
Charlie Wilson: Zvi.
Zvi: Afghanistan and Pakistan don't recognize our right to exist, we just got done fighting a war against Egypt, and everyone who has ever tried to kill me or my family has been trained in Saudi Arabia.
Gust Avrakotos: That's not true, Zvi. Some of them were trained by us.
