Paul Rawlins: What's that got to do with my knob?
Paul Rawlins: What is it? A toy shop?
Carrie Rawlins: No, it's a nursery. Ain't you ever seen a nursery?
Charlie Rawlins: No and neither 'ave you.
Bear: People? People? Oh, no! What scurvy luck.
Eglentine Price: I don't believe in giving animals ridiculous names. I call him Cosmic Creepers, because that's the name he came with.
Charlie Rawlins: No fried foods?
Eglentine Price: No.
Charlie Rawlins: How d'you keep your health?
Mr. Browne: Now, I shall place the framed glass in this brown, unprepared - unprepared, mark you, ladies and gentlemen - unprepared brown paper bag.
Mr. Browne: Women always lose things.
Mr. Browne: Bookman! Before your very eyes, I shall cause this bed, and all the occupants upon it, to disappear.
Bookman: Disappear? I should like to see a cheap-jack tenth-rate entertainer do a trick like that.
Mr. Browne: Cheap-jack entertainer. Now that was naughty.
Lion: Move it around, move it around.
Mr. Browne: Observe the fundamental weakness of the criminal mind. You will believe no one or anything.
Charlie Rawlins: Ref, are you blind?
Miss Price: Be quiet, Charles. Don't forget who the referee is.
Paul Rawlins: I liked you better as a rabbit, Charlie.
Eglentine Price: Oh, bother! I do hate shoddy work.
Mr. Browne: This good lady is looking for the other half of this book.
Eglentine Price: It's called The Spells of Astoroth.
Portobello Road Book Merchant: I don't keep no torn or damaged books here. What do you think I am, a ruddy waste paper merchant?