Instructor: Impressive shooting, Montgomery. You realize though, that you missed the target in the middle?
Earl Montgomery: Who, the brother? Oh I wasn't shooting at him.
Instructor: Mind telling me why not?
Earl Montgomery: He don't look suspicious, to me. Look at'em. One lone brother, surrounded by four white guys with guns? The man is terrified. What you want him to do, tap dance? Don't worry brother, I got you. Don't be afraid to dial 911. I keeps it clean, when Earl Montgomery's on the scene. What the problem is?
O-Ren Ishii: As your leader, I encourage you from time to time, but always in a respectful manner, to question my logic. If you're unconvinced a particular plan of action I've chosen is the wisest, tell me so. But allow me to convince you. And I promise you, right here and now, no subject will ever be taboo. Except the subject that was just under discussion. The price you pay for bringing up either my Chinese or American heritage as a negative is: I collect your fucking head. [Holds up Boss Tanaka's head.] Just like this fucker here. Now if any of you sons of bitches got anything else to say, NOW'S THE FUCKING TIME! [Silence.] I didn't think so.
David Gale: There once was a lesbian from Cancun/ who took a young man up to her room/ where they argued all night/ as to who had the right/ to do what and how much and to whom.
Ed: Listen to me, dude, I'm having a really fucked-up, really wet, very bad fucking day.
Louis Booker: Don't worry, Charlie. We'll get the money back, all right? He can't go far.
Charlie Carbone: It's a continent, Louis. He can go very far.
Louis Booker: I know it's a continent. I read the book.
Charlie Carbone: Did you happen to read the chapter on not putting your jacket on a wild animal?
Louis Booker: No, but I did read the chapter on how an aborigine can kill a white man with a twig. Do you want to see that one?
Morgan: What are we gonna do?
Kemper: I don't know... uh... we gotta call the cops, I guess.
Morgan: Um, yeah, on a list of bad ideas, that one goes, way up there. Oh, police officers, please, as you inspect a crime scene, which is now our van, please, ignore the colorful pinata, filled with marijuana, in case you happen to come across it, because it played no part, you know, whatsoever in the demise of this unfortunate, young, woman.
Brian O'Conner: You ready for this?
Roman: Come on, man. Guns, murderers and crooked cops? I was made for this, bro.
Sean Devine: What the fuck am I gonna tell him?"Hey, Jimmy. God said you owed another marker. He came to collect."
Will: You wanna call me "Daddy" while I fuck you, huh?
Aileen: I'll try. Why? You like to fuck your kids?
Ron Launius: What the fuck am I going to do with a microwave?
John Holmes: You can heat food with it.
Ron Launius: The only thing I want to heat up right now is some dope.
Sgt. Nathan West: As some of you may have heard, there is a hurricane warning tonight. Well, Rangers do not wait on good weather. Rangers do not wait for bright sun shiny days. Oh, no. Rangers are trained to operate in the worst possible conditions, and takes those conditions and turns them against their enemies. You each have one rifle, one side arm, and one white phosphorous grenade. This is a live E&E, so please keep those weapons safetied, so you are not to shoot off your nonexistent dicks.