Donna De Angelo: ...and when you are of age you are free to fuck up your own life, but until that time I'm afraid it's my job.
Larry Houdini: You know what? I think I liked you better as a boogey... peeerson.
Alvin Straight: I want to thank you for your kindness to a stranger.
Danny Riordan, Clermont Resident: It's been a genuine pleasure having you here, Alvin. Write to us some time.
Alvin Straight: I will.
Albert Collins: Silence is the most beautiful noise in the world.
Joshua Leonard: I heard two noises coming from two separate areas of space over there. One of them could have been an owl, but the other one sounded like a cackling.
Heather Donahue: No way!
Joshua Leonard: Yeah, it was like a serious cackling.
Heather Donahue: See, my problem is that I sleep like a fucking rock.
Michael Williams: If I heard a cackling, I would have shit in my pants!
Charlie Tweeder: Jonathan Moxon your are under arrest for not being naked with some sophomore chick who wants to bathe you with her tongue, now take off your god damn clothes and get in the car.
Michael Woods: You wouldn't happen to have any...turkey...bacon, would you?
Twister: Bacon comes from pigs, son, not turkey.
Orson Welles: I expected better of you, Mank.
Herman Mankiewicz: Me too, but I got used to it.
Assistant at Bewitched: You're wanted on the set.
Lucille: Honey, I'm wanted in seven states.
Theo Calder: I'm Dr. Calder. You've been charged with one count of murder and found incompetent to stand trial.
Pete: She had a demon in her for a while. My neighbour, Mrs. Karsh.
Theo Calder: Mm-hmm.
Pete: It would come and go. Nobody saw it... except me.
Theo Calder: What did it look like, the demon?
Pete: Um... Did you ever see "Alien" with Sigourney Weaver?
Theo Calder: It looked like a giant insect?
Pete: No. It looked like Sigourney Weaver.
Terry Stricter, MindHead Honcho: Happy premise #1.
Kit: Happy premise #1: There are no aliens.
Terry Stricter, MindHead Honcho: Happy premise #2.
Kit: Happy premise #2: There is no giant foot trying to squash me.
Terry Stricter, MindHead Honcho: Happy premise #3.
Kit: Happy premise #3: Even though I feel like I might ignite, I probably won't.
Lowell Bergman: We've got a guy who wants to talk, but he's constrained. What if he were compelled?
Mike Wallace: Oh, torture. Great ratings.
Oliver Lang: I'm a messenger Michael, I'm a messenger! There's millions of us, waiting to take up arms, ready to spread the word... millions of us.
Michael Faraday: No! The government's not who you're killing.
Oliver Lang: Yes. Yes... they'll pay. They'll pay for their sins. Their lies.
Michael Faraday: You're killing children! Children die.
Oliver Lang: Children... I know that. This is war, Michael. In a war, children die.
Rachel Lang: Please. Don't leave me. I don't have anyone. Please, God... let me die.
Titus: O handle not the theme, to talk of hands, Lest we remember still, that we have none.
Griss: Don't make me take off my sunglasses.
Doctor: What are you doing here, honey? You're not even old enough to know how bad life gets.
Cecilia: Obviously, Doctor, you've never been a 13-year-old girl.
The Shoveller: God's given me a gift. I shovel well. I shovel very well.
Penny: Having another hero cop dream, Uncle John?
Officer John Brown: Every time I close my eyes.