Newspaper Editor-in-Chief: West, keep the British accent out of your prose. Don't take advantage of the fact that your uncle owns the paper.
Peter West: As if I would.
Tatiana Donskaya: One day you will come to Moscow and you will see a clean subway.
Tripper: Important announcement - Some hunters have been seen in the woods near Piney Ridge trail and the fish and game commission has raised the legal kill limit on campers to three. So, if you're hiking today, please wear something bright and keep low.
Charles Bernstein: I'm Charles Bernstein. Attorney for the late Milton Parker.
Marvin Dummitz: You mean someone else is late now?
LAPD Captain: Any man who gives up his gun to some punk is a coward. Any man who does can kiss his badge goodbye, if I can help it. You're policemen. Put your trust in God.
Jack Flowers: Who's that black girl, Judy, that just left.
Judy: She's so beautiful.
Jack Flowers: That she is.
Judy: The first time I saw her I just put my hands on her face.
George Webber: If you were dancing with your wife, or girlfriend you knew in high school, and you said to her, Darling, they're playing our song, do you know what they'd be playing?
Don: What?
George Webber: Why Don't We Do It In The Road. Fuckin' hell kind of era is that?
Warden: The patient that came in yesterday is having a fit.
Van Helsing: Which one?
Warden: The one that bit the cow.
Maxwell: You had better learn how to play the game, and I don't mean just the game of football.
General Lord Chelmsford: For a savage, as for a child, chastisement is sometimes a kindness.
Sir Henry Bartle Frere: Let us hope, General, that this will be the final solution to the Zulu problem.
Jack Godell: I know the vibration was not normal.
Yin Chu: Golden Arm is as good as they say. With just his bare arms, he beat all of us. And if he had weapons.
Iron Feet Yang Hu Yun: Golden Arm never uses weapons. He claims he doesn't need them, and that using his bare arms is best. And, he's probably right.
Captain Mike Turner: In times of real trouble, the one thing man can depend on is the sympathy of the bank.
Rose: What are we ladies? What are we? We are waitresses at the banquet of life! Get into that kitchen and rattle them pots and pans - and you better look pretty good doin' it too, 'else you gonna lose you good thing. And why do we do that, I'll tell you why we do that? We do that to find love - Oh I love to be in love - don't you love to be in love?
Tom Trimble: Right after I'm burned at the stake I'll tell the whole story to King Arthur.
Senator Milburn: Would it not show more foresight to tell him before the burning?
Wally Stanton: I see that you're keeping up with the Agatha Christie affair. Tell me, do you think that she is dead? Everyone seems to.
Agatha Christie: They do, don't they?
Wally Stanton: That is all except her husband. I read this morning that he offered five hundred pounds for information. What do you think?
Agatha Christie: Perhaps that is all she is worth.
Jack the Ripper: We don't belong here? On the contrary, Herbert. I belong here completely and utterly. I'm home.