Wally Stanton: I see that you're keeping up with the Agatha Christie affair. Tell me, do you think that she is dead? Everyone seems to.
Agatha Christie: They do, don't they?
Wally Stanton: That is all except her husband. I read this morning that he offered five hundred pounds for information. What do you think?
Agatha Christie: Perhaps that is all she is worth.
Capt. Joe Patroni: Gee, I remember this Eurasian gal. She had these great big blue eyes. They called her the tarantula. You ever run into her?
Capt. Paul Metrand: No, I don't think so.
Capt. Joe Patroni: You'd remember if you did. She was a real ball breaker.
Maxwell: You had better learn how to play the game, and I don't mean just the game of football.
Terry 'The Toad' Fields: Oh, come on, look at me, I'm a free man! The war is over, and I win.
Warden: The patient that came in yesterday is having a fit.
Van Helsing: Which one?
Warden: The one that bit the cow.
Ben Mears: You'll have to get some hawthorn.
Susan Norton: Okay.
Ben Mears: And put it all over the house.
Jack Godell: I know the vibration was not normal.
David Halloran: You've got to go to him, and I've got to turn and walk away.
Rose: What are we ladies? What are we? We are waitresses at the banquet of life! Get into that kitchen and rattle them pots and pans - and you better look pretty good doin' it too, 'else you gonna lose you good thing. And why do we do that, I'll tell you why we do that? We do that to find love - Oh I love to be in love - don't you love to be in love?
Kathy Lutz: I just wish that... all those people hadn't died here. I mean... ugh! A guy kills his whole family. Doesn't that bother you?
George: Well, sure, but... houses don't have memories.
General Lord Chelmsford: For a savage, as for a child, chastisement is sometimes a kindness.
Sir Henry Bartle Frere: Let us hope, General, that this will be the final solution to the Zulu problem.
Billy Kramer: We need cereal.
Ted Kramer: Okay, what color?
Angelique: That's very theatrical, Joe.