Betty Cooper: I'm not gonna ask what you did with Veronica at Cheryl's. I'm asking you now, right now, if you love me, Archie, or even like me?
Archie Andrews: Of course I love you, Betty. But I can't give you the answer you want.
Betty Cooper: Why?
Archie Andrews: You are so perfect. I've never been good enough for you. I'll never be good enough for you.
Weir: The person you have is not my ex-wife. It's the person I sent in to get her. So, good luck with that motherfucker.
Harvey Leek: Nash, the most high-tech thing on this computer is the flying toaster screen saver.
80's Batman: This isn't a mudhole. It's an operating table. And I'm the surgeon.
Jack Harper: Good people has to die too, Tru.
Danny: But I thought you had to pee.
Anne Sorelli: My anger absorbed it. Outside, now.
FBI Agent Max Canary: If I'm not mistaken, she just cut off your balls, Derek.
Derek Jennings: Just the one, Max. Just the one.
Ike Evans: This will, get ugly.
Kate Fox: Sometimes confronting the past is the only way to move on.
The Log Lady: My log saw something that night.
Conner: So, Gar, what can you do?
Gar: It's, it's no big deal.
Conner: Come on. Can you show me?
Gar: Now's not the best time.
Conner: Well, can you tell me?
Gar: Yeah, yeah. It's kind of weird, but I can turn into a tiger.
Conner: [Laughing] No way!
Gar: Yeah.
Conner: [Long pause] What's a tiger?
Jessica Bennett: You can't give up on Charity, Miguel. Would Leonardo give up on Kate? Would Ross give up on Rachel? Would Bo give up on Hope?
Kojak: You can't corrupt it. And you know why? Because to corrupt it, you've got to show how corrupt you really are.
Artie Nelson: Y'know what the Talmud says? When someone's comin' to kill ya, get up early, kill 'em first.
Little John: Taxes we do not like.
Lucius Belyakov: A dark heart dwells where the branches meet / Anointed dagger plunge thee deep.
Gerry Standing: Will you stop creeping up on me.
Brian Lane: I don't creep, I glide.
Olivia Pope: It's handled.
Franky Doyle: I don't eat sausage, I'm vagitarian.