ALF (1986)

Willie: Stay away from the window, we've got a very nosy neighbor - Mrs. Ochmonek.
ALF: Ochmonek? Sounds like a typo.

Kate: ALF, you can use the portable TV in the bedroom.
ALF: But it's too small. It makes everyone look like Danny DeVito.

ALF: I'm on a new diet. I can eat as much of whatever I want.
Lynn: And you lose weight that way?
ALF: You do?

ALF: How can I read with all this quiet?

ALF: Like my old skeelball coach used to say: "Find something you're not good at, and then don't do it."

ALF: Are you gonna throw a hissy fit every time I squander a couple thousand dollars?

Jake Ochmonek: What are you, anyway?
ALF: I'm an alien, from the planet Melmac. I have powers you can only dream of.
Jake Ochmonek: Like what?
ALF: Uhhhm... I can watch 10 hours of TV, without ever getting up to go to the bathroom.

ALF: Putting humans in charge of the earth, is the cosmic equivalence of letting Eddie Murphy direct.

Willie: I'm gonna have my hamburger medium.
ALF: Medium? They are all the same size. Extra large.

ALF: It's the day before Christmas, I've hidden all the eggs.
Willie: ALF, we hide eggs at Easter, not at Christmas.
ALF: Oh, that's right. Christmas is where we carve the pumpkin.

ALF: Once we add sound, color and stick Eddie Murphy in there somewhere, it'll be a smash.