Clue

Wadsworth: The game's up, Scarlet. There are no more bullets left in that gun.
Miss Scarlet: Oh come on, you don't think I'm going to fall for that old trick.
Wadsworth: It's not a trick. There was one shot at Mr. Boddy in the study, two at the chandelier, two at the lounge door, and one at the singing telegram.
Miss Scarlet: That's not six.
Wadsworth: One plus two plus two plus one.
Miss Scarlet: Uh-uh. There was only one shot that got the chandelier, so that's one plus two plus ONE plus one.
Wadsworth: Even if you were right, that would be one plus one plus two plus one, not one plus two plus one plus one.
Miss Scarlet: Okay, fine. One plus two plus one...SHUT UP! Point is, there's one bullet left in this gun, and guess who's going to get it!

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Colonel Mustard: Wadsworth, am I right in thinking that there is nobody else in this house?
Wadsworth: Um, no.
Colonel Mustard: Then there is somebody else in the house?
Wadsworth: No, sorry. I said no meaning yes.
Colonel Mustard: No meaning yes? Look, I want a straight answer, is there someone else or isn't there, yes or no?
Wadsworth: Um...no.
Colonel Mustard: No, there is? Or no, there isn't?
Wadsworth: Yes.

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Chief: Alright. Who done it?
[Everyone starts blaming each other.]
Mr. Green: They all did it. But if you want to know who killed Mr. Boddy, I did, in the hall, with the revolver. All right chief, take them away. I'm gonna go home and sleep with my wife.

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Wadsworth: You see. It's just like the Mounties. We always get our man.
Mr. Green: Mrs. Peacock was a man?!

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Colonel Mustard: Are you trying to make me look stupid in front of the other guests?
Wadsworth: You don't need any help from me, sir.
Colonel Mustard: That's right!

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Mr. Green: So how did you know that Colonel Mustard works in Washington? Is he one of your clients?
Colonel Mustard: Certainly not.
Mr. Green: I was asking Miss Scarlet.
Colonel Mustard: Well, you tell them it's not true.
Miss Scarlet: It's not true.
Professor Plum: Is that true?
Miss Scarlet: No, it's not true.
Mr. Green: A-ha! So it is true.
Wadsworth: A double negative.
Colonel Mustard: Double negative? You mean you have photographs?
Wadsworth: That sounds like a confession to me. In fact, a double negative has lead to proof positive. I'm afraid you gave yourself away.

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Wadsworth: But he was your second husband. Your first husband also disappeared.
Mrs. White: Well, that was his job, he was an illusionist.
Wadsworth: But he never reappeared.
Mrs. White: He wasn't a very good illusionist.

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Miss Scarlet: Please don't hate me for trying to shoot you, dear.
Wadsworth: Frankly Scarlet, I don't give a damn.

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Wadsworth: I can explain everything...
Cop: You don't have to.
Wadsworth: I don't?
Cop: No, there's nothing illegal about any of this.
Wadsworth: Are you sure?
Cop: Of course, this is America.
Wadsworth: I see...
Cop: It's a free country, don't you know that?
Wadsworth: I didn't know it was THAT free.

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Mr. Green: Who would want to kill the cook?
Miss Scarlet: Dinner wasn't that bad.
Colonel Mustard: How can you make jokes at a time like this?
Miss Scarlet: It's my defense mechanism.
Colonel Mustard: Some defense. You know, if I was the killer I would kill you next.
Miss Scarlet: Oh!?
Colonel Mustard: I said if, if. Hey, come on, there is only one admitted killer here and it is certainly not me, it is her.
Mrs. White: Me? I've admitted nothing.
Colonel Mustard: Well, you've paid the blackmail. How many husbands have you had?
Mrs. White: Mine, or other womens'?
Colonel Mustard: Yours.
Mrs. White: Five.
Colonel Mustard: Five?
Mrs. White: Yes, five. Husbands should be like kleenex; soft, strong and disposable.
Colonel Mustard: You lure men to their deaths like a spider with flies.
Mrs. White: Flies are where men are most vulnerable.
Colonel Mustard: Right.

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Mrs. Peacock: Uh, is there a little girl's room in the hall?
Yvette: Oui oui, Madame.
Mrs. Peacock: No, I just wanna powder my nose.

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columbonet

Mrs. White: He didn't actually seem to like me very much. He had threatened to kill me in public.
Miss Scarlet: Why would he want to kill you in public?
Wadsworth: I think she meant he threatened, in public, to kill her. [Rolls eyes].

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Bishop73

Wadsworth: Well, to make a long story short.
Colonel Mustard: Too late.

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Wadsworth: And then the gong was struck by the cook.

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Wadsworth: You all thought Mr. Boddy was dead. But, why? None of you met him 'til tonight.
Mr. Green: You're Mr. Boddy.
Professor Plum: Wait a minute. So who did I kill?
Wadsworth: My butler.
Professor Plum: Oh, shucks.

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Cop: Let me outta here! Let me outta here! You have no right to shut me in. I'll book you for false arrest and wrongful imprisonment and obstructing an officer in the course of his duty and murder.
Wadsworth: What do you mean, murder?
Cop: I just said it so you would open the door.

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Wadsworth: The cook and Yvette were his accomplices! I know, because I was Mr. Boddy's butler, that the cook had worked for one of you!
Colonel Mustard: I see... So... Whoever knew... That the cook was involved... Killed her?

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Mrs. White: Are you a cop?
Mr. Green: No, I'm a plant.
Miss Scarlet: A plant? I thought men like you were usually called a fruit.
Mr. Green: Very funny.

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