Julie Pierce: Oh my god! My teeth don't match my nose.
William Gates: When I had some real problems, I couldn't go to none of them about it. Y'know, I was having some problems with Catherine's family and my family, and I said, 'Coach Pingatore, their family been getting on me about I'm not doing this, and I'm not doing that.' And the only thing Coach Pingatorte could say is, 'Write them off.' That was all he told me. I was like... what kind of advice is that?
Senior in restaurant #1: If you have job, you wear the pants.
Hood: So, what we wanna know is are you a brotha or a sista?
Pat: Well, I'm an only child.
Jack Hammond: That's the question on the minds of all your viewers? Whether I run out of gas or not? Tell you what, Jer. You let your viewers know that I hope Miss Voss' fear and my desperation are entertainment enough for them. After all, that is what this is all about, isn't it? The story. As it breaks. Live. Coming to you from the bad guy himself. I mean we wouldn't want your viewers to change the fucking channel, now, would we?
John Slade: The name's Slade.
Julian Rogers: Super. Here's an idea. Why don't you spell it out for me so I can get it right on your tombstone.
Yvonne Biasi: Who wants ice cream on their pie? Who wants pie?
Billy: I stole cars at school. Take them over at break. Leave it parked outside the gates and at the end of the day I was the only kid to drive home. I was a fucking hero.
Urgl: Your body's gone.
Engywook, Male Gnome: Well, your body went years ago.
Norville: You're a MUNCIE girl?
Susan Hendler: Of course everyone knows! I'm so old fashioned, I greet my employees with a handshake.
Maurice L. Pogue: It's so nice seeing all your faces here: John and Susan and Mary and Fred and Ethel, Little Ricky.
Johnny McFarley: Hey Peaches, want some ribs?
Terry McKay: I guess I'm happy when I don't want to be anywhere else but where I am.
John Lennon: We're gonna be big Stu, we're gonna be too big for Liverpool, we're gonna be too big for Hamburg, we're gonna be too big for our own bloody good.
Silas Crow: My name is Silas Crow. I'm 18-years-old. For a year, me and Frank Fencepost been trying to get into this mechanic school. First, they tell us we gotta write a story. Something about something we know. Well, for a long time I couldn't find one, I mean, lots of stuff goes on here, but I couldn't see it as stuff you'd write down.
Big Mike: Hey, Cupcake, what the fuck you think you're looking at?
Forrest Taft: Nothing much at all.
Doug Chesnic: Don't you see? If he is involved, then her life is worthless, you understand? They had to fucking kill her.